


Violet Light

by soulfulsin



Category: DuckTales (Cartoon 2017)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-24
Updated: 2019-11-29
Packaged: 2020-10-27 06:02:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 25,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20755520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soulfulsin/pseuds/soulfulsin
Summary: Tales and misadventures of Lena and Violet Sabrewing as Lena learns to adjust to not being a shadow anymore and living with a stranger that she has to learn how to trust.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve had this idea rattling around in my brain for a while now. This is set right after Friendship Hates Magic, because while it’s great that Frank’s given us some context via Tumblr, I’m not really satisfied with how character development on screen has proceeded. So this is my attempt to bridge the gap.
> 
> Updates to this will be staggered. I want to finish one of my other series before updating this one again--otherwise, I've got too many things going on at once. (Probably after I've finished the Moonvasion AU, which is almost done).

Lena wished she had a backpack to heft or something to hide behind. She felt awkward and ill at ease here, at this random house that Violet had brought her to. Violet claimed she wanted to study Lena and her magic, which made Lena feel more like a test subject than a person. Then again, she _wasn’t _a person. She shouldn’t be offended. And she wasn’t. She was just unsettled.

After her resurrection and subsequent return to the real world, she didn’t know how to talk to Violet. Webby clearly valued Violet and Lena had had to squash the bitter jealousy and fear that Violet had evoked. But that didn’t mean she had come around to thinking everything was copacetic between them. Violet might not have stolen Webby away, but she was still a stranger to Lena. 

“Are you coming?” Violet queried as Lena hesitated over the threshold. She was staring up at a house that was painted lavender with a flower bed in front of it. How domestic. Her amulet glowed in her chest, which was something else she’d need to get used to. Magica’s magic was centered within _her _now. Magica couldn’t take it from her or reduce her to a shadow again. 

Could she? Lena wanted to feel more certain than she was.

Swallowing her misgivings, she followed Violet into a cool, spacious hall that branched off into the kitchen. Two men, one a sabrewing and the other a hummingbird, were preparing a meal. It smelled good, which reminded Lena that she hadn’t eaten anything in months. Shadows didn’t need to eat, but that might have changed. Why was it everything she thought revolved around that wretched sorceress? She was sick of it. And sick of herself, to tell the truth. 

It was odd that Violet’s family could see her. 

“Violet’s brought home a friend!” the male hummingbird said, delighted. “I’m Violet’s father. And this is Violet’s other father.”

For once, Lena didn’t know how to introduce herself. What she was supposed to say? “Hi, I’m Lena, and I’m a magical construct?” That wouldn’t do. She felt wrong-footed in general here and she wished she’d stayed in McDuck Manor and demanded Scrooge make good on his promise to let her into his family. The insidious voice inside her head that always spoke in Magica’s voice whispered that Scrooge never fulfilled his promises. 

“This is Lena,” Violet announced, putting an arm around her. Lena’s eyes narrowed, but she decided to allow it. For now. She would need to have a discussion with Violet about casual touching. She hadn’t realized how many exceptions she’d made for Webby until Webby wasn’t here. 

Webby wasn’t here. It was like an ache in Lena’s chest. She’d spent so long attached to the girl that not being near her felt wrong. She could have her own life again, true, and not be tethered to whatever Webby wanted to do. Or sing. That duet stuff with Dewey had been _super _annoying.

“She’s going to be staying here for a while,” Violet added. 

Was she? She supposed she couldn’t return to live beneath the theatre. Besides, to be there would be to be reminded of Magica’s schemes and she needed to dredge that horrible woman out of her head, if at all possible. She’d relived her death over and over for months. And her thoughts were turning morbid again. She cursed inwardly.

“I don’t have any family I can stay with,” Lena quickly added. “Or any family at all.”

Magica was _not _her aunt. Lena bit her tongue and nearly made it bleed with her need to suppress that.

“You’re an orphan,” the male sabrewing said, flipping over something in the frying pan. Whatever it was, it smelled good and Lena’s beak watered. It smelled like fish. She hadn’t had fish in ages. 

“You could say that,” Lena said, shrugging. 

“She’s a magical construct,” Violet said, pulling out her book on the tulpas and other supernatural phenomena. “She’s the living shadow of Magica de Spell.”

Lena could have killed her. This was not how she’d wanted to lead. She wished Webby was here. For a moment, she even wished the boys were here. They wouldn’t have put it so tactlessly. Of course, everything with Violet seemed to be stated baldly and scientifically. Webby would’ve smoothed over the edges. Lena missed her painfully.

“She’s a living shadow?” the male sabrewing said and then blinked. “Where are my manners? I’m Tomas. And this is Stefan. We’re pleased to meet you, Lena.”

“Yeah, I’ll bet you are,” Lena muttered.

“Lena’s been trapped in the shadow realm for months,” Violet continued, apparently badly missing Lena’s cue to _shut up. _ “Of course, it’s all very fascinating.”

“It sounds fascinating,” Stefan agreed. He frowned lightly. “Are you all right, Lena?”

“Fine,” Lena spat. She turned to Violet. “Where am I staying?”

Her hostility seemed to have caught Violet off guard because she blinked in confusion before leading her down the hallway, to the left, and then to a small bedroom full of books. Yeah, she should’ve guessed this was where Violet slept. It was like a nerd city here. Even Webby didn’t have that many books littering her room. Lena’s throat tightened and she swallowed past the constriction.

“Should I have introduced you differently?” Violet queried.

“It’s fine. It’s whatever,” Lena said, but even as she said it, her tone crept toward anger again. “What do you mean by ‘she’ll be staying here a while’?”

“You don’t have anywhere else to go, do you?” Violet queried.

Lena looked down at the floor. “No.”

“Where did you live before this?” Violet asked and beckoned for Lena to join her on the bed. Lena did so reluctantly, more because she felt obligated than because she wanted to. She hadn’t really spoken with Violet before this arrangement had been made. They hadn’t wanted to bring up the subject of Lena with Scrooge because of Magica de Spell. It was like everything with Lena was tainted with Magica’s prints all over it. It made Lena sick.

“Beneath the theatre,” Lena admitted.

“That doesn’t sound safe,” Violet said.

Lena shrugged, not willing to go into the specifics.

“If Webby trusts me, you may wish to trust me as well,” Violet replied. “It would be a sensible thing to do.”

“Webby trusted _me_ and look where that got her,” Lena muttered, unable to keep the bitterness out of her voice. Violet took her hands.

“Webby is fine,” Violet reminded her. “And you are no longer bound to Magica de Spell. I believe you have proven yourself to Webby and, as we have her in common, it would be a good idea--”

“To trust you, yeah, I know,” Lena said. “I have some issues with that.”

Violet looked sympathetic, which bugged her. She wasn’t used to people being decent around her. She didn’t deserve it. Even if she’d been a pawn in Magica’s game, she’d still acted on her behalf. She’d still...Lena’s throat was almost too tight to speak now.

“You’re welcome to stay as long as you like,” Violet added. “I know you’d rather be in McDuck Manor.”

“It’s fine,” Lena said. “A place to crash is a place to crash.”

“You know, oftentimes people present a tough facade to conceal vulnerability,” Violet said.

“You don’t say,” Lena said sarcastically.

“Sarcasm is also often employed,” Violet added.

“Thanks, Baymax,” Lena said. 

“What?” 

“Never mind,” Lena said. She should’ve known that a mega nerd like Violet wouldn’t watch TV. In fact, there wasn’t a TV in the room. Then again, Webby didn’t have one in her room either. The boys spent their time in front of a TV so old that it was a _tube set_. Talk about cheap. Get with the times, old man.

Lena had to stifle a snicker, though, at the idea of Violet being her “personal healthcare assistant”. The mirth faded as quickly as it had arisen. She stared around at Violet’s room, with its small bed, shelves upon shelves of books lining the walls, and a bench seat at the window that should fit Lena. She assumed that was where she was going. If she’d had stuff, she would’ve put it down there.

Violet was watching her. 

“Do shadows sleep?” 

Lena shrugged. “Not that well.”

When she did sleep, she had nightmares. There was no point in sleeping in the shadow realm--it wasn’t like she lost or gained energy. She’d been at a constant low ebb until Violet had brought Magica’s amulet back. At the thought, Lena reached for it only to remember that it was inside of her. It was like her heart now. 

“Fascinating,” Violet said. 

“You’re not really going to make me your lab rat, are you? Because if that’s it, I’m out,” Lena said flatly.

“I would like to study you, yes, but I would like your permission to do so,” Violet replied. She frowned. “I’m sorry that we got off on the wrong foot earlier. I had no intention of stealing Webbigail from you.”

“Yeah, well…” It seemed like an apology was merited here, but Lena didn’t know what to say. “I’m sorry I assumed you were evil.”

Violet smiled. “A reasonable assumption to make given your history.”

“Yeah...this is weird,” Lena said, staring around her again. “I’m not used to people knowing about me.”

“You spent most of your life concealing your true identity.”

“If you can call it a ‘life’. It wasn’t much of one,” Lena said and then shrugged again. She was doing a lot of that. It was starting to grate on her nerves. _She _was starting to grate on her nerves. It wasn’t hard to do, considering how much Lena hated herself.

Lena heard footsteps and stiffened, alert for danger, perhaps too much so. It was only Stefan.

“What would you like for dinner?” Stefan asked. “We’re having crepes.”

“I don’t really care. Crepes are fine,” Lena replied.

Stefan frowned, contemplating her. “You’ll be fine here, you know. Violet doesn’t have many friends--”

Lena remembered Violet’s tale of her loneliness and desire to learn more. It sounded like Violet didn’t have _any _friends aside from her and Webby. Lena knew what that was like. Maybe she ought to be nicer to Violet. After all, she didn’t have to put her up.

“We’ll be fine, Dad,” Violet reassured him. “Won’t we, Lena?”

Lena nodded and although Stefan remained suspicious, he told them that he’d expect them for dinner and left.

Violet perched on her bed and stared at Lena. Lena stared back.

“What?” Lena said.

“I highly doubt Magica de Spell could find you here,” Violet said. “She’d be more likely to hunt for you at McDuck Manor. This is better, defensively speaking.”

“Yeah...can we not talk about her?” Lena said. “Or anything?”

She was tired suddenly, exhausted. Time had no meaning in the shadow realm, but all of this excitement and having a body again had drained her.

“We can sit in silence if you wish,” Violet said. 

“Thanks,” Lena said. Violet pulled out that stupid book about the tulpas, etc. and Lena just sat there, on her bed, breathing. She hadn’t needed to do so in the shadow realm and it was a novelty she hadn’t expected to feel again. She was safe here. Safe. 

Now if only she could believe it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not too fond of that title. I might change it. Did you know Lena is short for Magdalena? XDD My Mags (from my Fairly Oddparents fics.)
> 
> Speaking of characters of mine, since I screwed up, Tomas is closer to Stef than Stefan ended up being. lol
> 
> Written in the Saint Clare’s Hospital cafeteria while Mom goes for her biopsy. Woot.

At some point, Lena had fallen asleep. She awoke to find Violet staring at her and she yelped, reaching for her magic without thinking about it. Her amulet flared and threw Violet back a foot. Terror seized her, thinking of her nightmare with Webby and turning the puppet Webby into ash, with only her ribbon left. Her chest hurt and she scrambled backward. It was the first time she’d been able to sleep since Magica’s attack and that was the first thing she thought of. Of course.  
  
“Don’t do that!” Lena snarled. She didn’t appear to have hurt her; Violet had caught herself on her bedpost. Rather than reprimand her or throw her out, Violet was watching her curiously. Lena’s heart would’ve been slamming around in her chest if she’d had one instead of the amulet. Sometimes, her body mimicked real reactions so well that she could almost taste her heartbeat, the one she didn’t have. It took a minute for her breathing to calm.  
  
“Are you all right?” Violet queried as if Lena hadn’t just flung her backward.  
  
“Fine,” Lena spat, rubbing at her eyes. “Stupid nightmare.”  
  
“What was it about?”  
  
“What do you care?” Lena snapped. She wrapped her arms about her legs. “You’re just studying me, aren’t you? What does it matter what I dream about?”  
  
“If Webbigail and I can be friends, then you can trust me,” Violet said slowly, unperturbed.  
  
“Right. Webby trusts you,” Lena reminded herself aloud. She wasn’t going to mention that Webby’s track record wasn’t that great when it came to recognizing threats. That brought back to mind her nightmare and her throat tightened.  
  
“Tell me about it?” Violet pressed.  
  
“Why do you care?” Lena asked, though there was no venom in her voice now. “You’re her friend, not mine.”  
  
“You look like you could use another friend. And wouldn’t you like to be able to trust someone besides Webbigail?”  
  
Lena didn’t speak. Instead, her gaze went sideways, searching for something else to focus on. Unfortunately, nothing caught her attention. Reluctantly, she looked back at Violet. She didn’t have Webby’s earnest enthusiasm, but she looked open and honest. Lena sighed.  
  
“You can trust me,” Violet repeated.  
  
“It’s nothing,” Lena said. The more she said it, the weaker her response grew. Violet surveyed her once more but seemed to conclude that she hadn’t unlocked that level of friendship to obtain her backstory and let it go. Lena sighed, relieved. She hadn’t told Webby about the nightmare—there hadn’t been time and more importantly, she hadn’t felt comfortable revealing that much of Magica’s plan. She’d been convinced at the time that Webby would hate her for using her.  
  
There was also the simple matter of Lena not knowing what to do with herself now that she had her own life. She’d spent the last fifteen years perpetuating Magica’s agenda. She knew what she liked (somewhat), but she’d never been free to pursue her own interests unless they were connected to that stupid dime somehow. She wished she could’ve pitched the dime into Vesuvius.  
  
“Crepes are ready!” Stefan announced, poking his head in. He scanned the room. “You didn’t bring much with you, Lena.”  
  
She shrugged. It looked like she was back to that again. “What you see is what you get.”  
  
Stefan sent a quizzical look at Violet, who shrugged. They trooped back into the kitchen and Lena stared around her at the decorations. In the hallway, what she’d missed earlier, was a painting of a DNA molecule. Beside that were other scientific paintings that Lena couldn’t make heads or tails of. Man, these people were weird. She hugged her sweater closer to herself unobtrusively.  
  
Stefan and Tomas had laid out crepes along with different flavors of jam and filling. Lena took her place and once everyone had been served with their food and drink of choice, she took a small bite of the crepes. It wasn’t bad. It reminded her of when she’d been struggling in Paris and she’d first been ‘born’. Magica had to teach her everything. Back then, the sorceress had been considerably more patient. That was where “Aunt Magica” had come in. Well, that and it looked strange for her to be referencing someone that no one else could see.  
  
“I wasn’t aware shadows ate,” Violet said. Lena choked.  
  
“Violet!” Stefan scolded and patted Lena on the back. Lena drank orange juice (it must’ve been breakfast for dinner day at the Sabrewings) and gradually stopped coughing. She shot Violet a poisonous look.  
  
“I don’t if you’re going to keep making stupid comments,” Lena shot back.  
  
“You’re all right, you’re all right,” Stefan soothed. “Violet, she’s our guest.”  
  
“Yeah, I’m not that hungry,” Lena said. “Thanks but no thanks.”  
  
She wanted to run back to McDuck Manor, but that wasn’t an option. The house was small and she assumed the upstairs had Violet’s dads’ room, which she didn’t want to stumble into. There was nowhere for her to go; at least McDuck Manor was huge. Then again, she had to grow accustomed to being seen and heard again. She’d spent three lousy months as a non-entity and now Violet was treating her like a lab rat. Was this what she’d been resurrected for? Someone else’s amusement?  
  
The cups shattered. Lena gasped, realizing a moment too late she had lost control of her magic. She winced; no one had been injured—the cups were plastic, but Lena felt wretched. It had been a long time indeed since she’d been such a magical novice as to lose control that badly.  
  
Magica’s voice hissed in her mind and told her she was worthless, that her only use was getting the dime and she couldn’t even do that.  
  
“Lena, it’s all right,” Stefan said. “We’ll clean up. It’s all right.”  
  
He looked over at his daughter. “Violet, a word?”  
  
This wouldn’t have happened if she’d been in McDuck Manor. If anyone could trust her around Scrooge McDuck, that was. What was left of her cup trembled on the table and she swallowed past a hard lump in her throat.  
  
Stefan drew Violet out of the room and Tomas cleaned up the mess. When Lena started to help anyway, he shook his head.  
  
“You sit. Relax. You’re fine. No one’s upset with you,” Tomas soothed.  
  
Lena didn’t know what to say to that. Even though both of Violet’s dads had told her not to clean up, she did it anyway for a distraction. She had no idea what Stefan was saying to Violet and she feared for a minute that it meant they were looking for an excuse to get rid of her. Where would she go if that was the case? What would she do? She’d have to return to the area beneath the stage. Tears pricked her eyes. She didn’t want to go back. To live there again would be to return to that nightmare. Magica’s signature was all over that place.  
  
“Lena?” Tomas queried as she finished and handed him the last remnants of glass. He’d cleaned up the orange juice that had spilled on the table.  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
She kept her gaze averted and waited for the dread words to fall.  
  
“It was an accident,” Tomas said. “I’m sure you didn’t mean it. You’re a little upset right now, aren’t you?”  
  
Lena shrugged. “I guess.”  
  
“You went through a lot,” Tomas continued and put his hands on her shoulders. “You’re safe here. I’m sure being with Magica was no picnic, but she can’t reach you here. And we’re not going to get upset with you over a little spilled drink, okay? Violet means well. She’s just not used to having friends her own age—or, well, whatever age you are. But we’re glad you’re here.”  
  
They were glad? Even after she’d wrecked their meal? They weren’t upset with her? Lena didn’t know how to parse that. How could they tolerate what she’d done without scolding her? She deserved their ill-temper and their cruelty, didn’t she? Didn’t she?  
  
Tomas, the sabrewing, smiled at her. She couldn’t muster one in response.  
  
“When Violet told us she was bringing a friend home, I thought she meant Webbigail,” Tomas admitted. “We weren’t expecting this. But that doesn’t mean it’s a bad surprise.  
  
“Did you know ‘Lena’ means light?”  
  
Lena surprised herself by laughing. “Really? Then why did Magica name me that?”  
  
“Your guess is as good as mine,” Tomas said. “It’s a strange thing to name your shadow. Maybe she subconsciously realized you weren’t her darkness, but her light?”  
  
“That seems like a bit of a stretch.”  
  
“You’re right. That woman doesn’t seem like she considers anyone but herself and her aims.”  
  
“You’ve got that right,” Lena muttered.  
  
“But you’re free of her,” Tomas said, finishing up, wringing out his dish towel, and then throwing it in the washing machine across the room. It landed and he grinned.  
  
“Three points! Seriously, don’t blame yourself. Accidents happen. You didn’t ruin anything. Besides, we have more drink. And the food’s okay. I love the taste of orange juice with crepes. It gives it that extra special something.”  
  
“Weirdness?” Lena returned and Tomas grinned.  
  
“Sure. We can call it that. We’re all weird here. You’ll fit right in.”  
  
“Are you sure? I did kinda break four of your cups…” Lena faltered.  
  
“Positive. Relax. We can always buy more. Don’t worry about it.”  
  
Lena relaxed and Tomas squeezed her shoulder.  
  
“And I’m sure Stefan and Violet will be back,” he said and rolled his eyes. “Violet sometimes doesn’t think before she speaks. I love her, but her ability to defuse an emotional situation sometimes leaves something to be desired. It’s probably our fault—she’s homeschooled. We didn’t think that she’d have proper social interaction in school.”  
  
“Sounds like Webby,” Lena said.  
  
“Ah, so you have experience with this sort of thing.”  
  
“Oh, yeah,” Lena said, rolling her eyes. “Webs takes the cake there. It makes sense they’d attract each other.”  
  
“I look forward to meeting her too,” Tomas said.  
  


* * *

  
  
“Violet…” Stefan sighed.  
  
“I was merely making an observation,” Violet said, a little testy. She folded her arms across her chest and Stefan stared at her until she stopped. She deflated.  
  
“You need to tread carefully around Lena,” Stefan said.  
  
“What do you mean? I’m aware of the mistreatment she must have suffered at Magica’s hands,” Violet said and Stefan shook his head.  
  
“I don’t think you’re aware of the extent, Vi. I’m not saying I don’t want her here. I’m just saying that you need to be a little more careful what you say around her. She’s overly sensitive right now.”  
  
Violet frowned.  
  
“She’s been abused and, unless I miss my guess, it’s most if not the entire time she was saddled with Magica de Spell,” Stefan added. “Don’t treat her like a scientific experiment. And if you’re going to, for heaven’s sake, don’t say that.”  
  
Violet cast a quick glance back into the kitchen. Her other father had actually made Lena laugh.  
  
“She looks like a good kid,” Stefan said. “Just be careful, okay? She needs gentleness and compassion right now. I know it may be impossible for you, but if you could try to be less blunt, that might go a long way.”  
  
After a moment, Violet nodded and Stefan smiled. There was a painful twist to his expression but Violet didn’t ask. Stefan never spoke about his past—she knew far more about Tomas’s childhood than Stefan’s. But she didn’t want to trample into area Stefan considered painful. Perhaps that was how her father could tell by looking that Lena had been abused.  
  
“Ready to go back?” Stefan said and Violet nodded. They headed back in and Tomas was in the middle of showing off, flipping the crepes and missing the frying pan. To Violet’s eyes, it’d been deliberate. Nonetheless, Tomas grinned at Lena.  
  
“See?” Tomas said. “Mistakes happen. It’s no one’s fault.”  
  
Lena was relaxed and her eyes sparkled. “But you missed the pan by a mile.”  
  
“You say a mile, I say potato,” Tomas replied.  
  
“That makes no sense,” Lena shot back.  
  
“Do you want the next one on your head, missy? Because that’s how it’s gonna go. Pink haired crepes,” Tomas teased.  
  
“I could make better crepes than that,” Lena retorted.  
  
“Oh, really?” Tomas challenged.  
  
“Ya rly,” Lena countered.  
  
“It looks like it’s all under control,” Stefan murmured. He smiled. “I told you. Handle her with the kid gloves.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) I assume the chronology goes FHM, NoKM, and then there is a gap between those two and Moonvasion. I assume that there’s at least a week between FHM and NoKM. So this fic will take place in that week and then after NoKM.   
2) Lena’s VA actually said that Lena loves Webby. You can interpret that as you want in regards to this fic. As this is hewing close to canon, however, there won’t be anything romantic mentioned. Unless you count pale romance--and if you understood that reference, you get a cookie.  
3) Retail really is evil.

It was pitch dark in Violet’s room. Realistically, that should make it easier to sleep. Unfortunately, Lena feared sleep with an almost unnatural strength. She knew what might transpire if she fell asleep--nightmares and nothing else. Violet had already fallen asleep, because what would trouble her? Even if Violet’s dads had reassured Lena that she’d done nothing wrong and they weren’t upset with her, Lena still worried she would overstay her welcome and find herself back in the theatre.

Okay, so, sleeping. Sleeping was a normal thing that shadows and non-shadows did. When she had a corporeal form, she slept. She needed it and the energy that it provided. And sleeping was totally something she could handle. Despite having slept earlier, she remained exhausted.

She willed herself not to fall asleep, but, of course, as with her every attempt to fend off something by willpower, it failed miserably. 

* * *

She found herself on Mount Vesuvius with Magica. Magica’s back was to her and she was throwing things into a cauldron. Magica’s old familiar/brother, Poe, had situated himself on an overhanging shelf that Lena suspected Magica had constructed just for him. Maybe if Lena was really quiet, Magica wouldn’t notice her approach and she’d be able to slip into another dream, perhaps one of her choosing for once.

Poe squawked and Lena cursed. Magica whirled, her feathers their previous green. Lena groped for the amulet that was embedded in her chest. Terror rushed through her seeing the sorceress, but Lena stood her ground. That didn’t stop her chest from aching, however.

“Ah, little Lena, you’re here just in time,” Magica said. “I’m missing one ingredient.”

Her eyes flashed. “My magic.”

“You have your magic,” Lena said. After all, Magica had her green feathers. Therefore, she couldn’t be powerless. Lena thought to retreat but there was nowhere to run to. All around her was empty space and no cover. 

“‘You have your magic,’” Magica mimicked. She pointed at Poe. “Does this look like I have my full powers?”

“I don’t know how he became a raven and I don’t care,” Lena rejoined. “I don’t want any part of your schemes anymore.”

Magica smiled. “Ah, but you can’t escape them. You and I are linked, you know. You are my shadow. We belong together, just like the old days. You used to think of me as your aunt.”

“And then you abused me and killed me!” Lena countered.

Magica shook her head. “You disobeyed me. I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“Really,” Lena said flatly. “Because I remember differently.”

“Come now, little Lena,” Magica said and then smiled brighter. “My little light.”

This was edging uncomfortably close to her earlier conversation with Tomas. How did Magica_ know _that? How could she? Had she been privy to that conversation? No, it wasn’t possible. Lena was free. _Free_.

“I’m not your anything!” 

Magica shook her head sadly as if Lena were a particularly disappointing pupil. “You’re my shadow. And always will be. You have no one--only me. Only I can help you.”

“I don’t need your help,” she spat.

“Where will you be when your so-called ‘friend’ Violet turns on you?” Magica countered. “At least you know I’ve cared for you in the past. I can do so again. We can do great things together, you and I. All you need to do is trust me.”

“And you’ll destroy me again!”

“I find your lack of faith disturbing,” Magica said. “Haven’t I always been good to you? Wasn’t I always caring before you ran into Webster?”

“_Webby_,” Lena corrected, folding her arms across her chest. “You never get her name right.”

“If Webby cares so much about you, then why aren’t you in McDuck Manor?” 

Lena had no response to that. Magica draped her arms about Lena’s shoulders. 

“Webby is Scrooge McDuck’s protege and you are mine,” Magica said gently, coaxing. “You belong to me, Lena de Spell.”

“No!” 

The cry was ripped out of her and she bolted upright, abruptly awake. Sweat coated her feathers and she panted, doubled over in her sleeping bag. Shaking, she hugged her knees. It’d go away. It was just a nightmare. It was a nightmare and nothing else. She was okay. Lena buried her face in her knees and shuddered.

A light came on and Lena hissed. Violet had turned on a flashlight that she apparently kept near her bed and she’d nearly blinded Lena with it before pointing it away from her. It left the room in a strange semi-dark state that likewise grated her nerves. 

“Lena?” Violet queried.

“What?” Lena snapped. “I’m fine.”

“You’re shaking,” Violet said and left her bed to sit beside her. “Have you been having nightmares?”

“No,” Lena lied. Sadly, lying was second nature to her after all of this time. Violet scowled.

“You were crying in your sleep.”

“No, I wasn’t.”

Violet stared. “You’re shaking and your feathers are soaked with sweat. I highly doubt you were having pleasant dreams. You’re also hugging your knees.”

“Why are you being so pushy?” Lena snapped. “I told you, it’s nothing.”

“I am not going to harm you,” Violet reiterated. “You can trust me. I promise.”

“I’m _fine_,” Lena snapped, tempted to curse her out too. Maybe biting her head off would get Violet to back off. She was bristling now and recalling her nightmare with Magica was not helping. She forced herself to release her legs.

“I find it’s more helpful to discuss these things than to bottle them up,” Violet said. “Perhaps divulging the contents would prove therapeutic.”

Lena threw her a look of utmost disgust. “What did you do, swallow a dictionary? You’re worse than Webby.”

“You are using sarcasm as a defense mechanism,” she observed. 

Lena gritted her teeth. Cursing Violet out was extremely tempting but also foolish. Violet could throw her out. Maybe she wouldn’t do it in the middle of the night--that didn’t seem like her style--but come morning, this could prove a very temporary arrangement. Lena would be cutting off her beak to spite her face. Even so, the urge to tell Violet to sod off was strong.

“Lena,” Violet said and her voice was gentle. It was the gentleness that oddly perturbed Lena more than her scientific inquiries. It showed concern and Lena couldn’t take it. She couldn’t take everyone’s attitude. None of it was right. She didn’t deserve their compassion.

“It would be beneficial to talk about it.”

“I’m _fine_!” Lena snarled and the flashlight broke in a rather fantastic display of brightness before casting them both into blackness again. Lena cursed aloud.

“That would argue otherwise.”

“Why are you being so nice to me? What’s the catch?”

“Catch?” Violet repeated. “There’s no ‘catch’.”

“Then stop it. If you’re not going to gain anything by it, why do it?” 

Lena folded her arms across her chest and was grateful for the dark. It was easier to conceal her emotions and present a facade. Violet touched her arm and then hugged her. The hug threw Lena for a loop.

“Why?” Lena murmured.

“Why what?”

“Why are you being so nice to me? Is it because you’re using me as a scientific experiment? Do you actually _want _to be friends?” Behind that was a question best left unasked--” who would want to be friends with _me_?”

“I find it difficult to believe you presented none of the same issues with Webby.”

“Of course I didn’t,” she hissed. “I was using her. By the time I decided to stop, it was too late.”

Violet was watching her in the darkness. It was unnerving how closely the younger girl was paying attention to her. Her arm remained wrapped about Lena and after spending what felt like an eternity without physical contact, Lena was having problems maintaining her distance. She sighed, wishing Violet would just stop. Her defenses weren’t great as it was. How was she supposed to fend Magica off on her own like this and still keep the others at bay?

“Yet you grew to care for her a great deal.”

Lena’s throat was tight. “Webby was the first person who saw me for me and wanted to be friends with me.”

She was the first person who’d believed in her and had such boundless light-sided energy. She was so _happy_, such a free spirit. She was intense and fierce in everything she did, including being fiercely loyal. It was like a moth being drawn to the light. Lena couldn’t help but love her. Of course, she couldn’t articulate any of that. So she swallowed past the lump in her throat and scrubbed at her eyes.

“You sacrificed yourself for her.”

Lena scoffed, trying to add levity to the situation but failing. “Yeah, well, it was the least I could do.”

Violet shifted so that they were knee to knee and the younger girl was sitting in front of her.

“Tell me about your nightmare.”

“This again?” Lena huffed but, almost against her will, she found herself ceding ground. “It was about Magica, okay? It’s always about her.”

“I told you that she couldn’t harm you here.”

“No, you said it was _unlikely_,” Lena spat. “That’s not the same thing, Vi.”

“Perhaps a glass of warm milk would help you calm down. I find sitting in the kitchen with my thoughts and warm milk and cookies--”

“What am I? Santa?” she scoffed.

“You don’t need to be so hostile,” Violet scolded. “I am not attacking you.”

She leaned forward and took Lena’s hands. “You’re safe here.”

Lena swallowed back bitter laughter. She wasn’t safe anywhere. Yet she wanted it to be true. She wanted to believe that Magica would leave her alone eventually. It might be the only way she could ever sleep again. 

“Okay,” Lena said after a minute. “I’ll bite.”

Violet stood and helped Lena to her feet as well. She surprised her with another hug and stroked her quivering feathers. Although she still missed Webby, she did feel better with Violet’s ministrations. She just couldn’t let go and trust as easily. Or at all. 

* * *

Magica hated her life. She wanted her powers back. Moreover, until Lena delivered them, she was reduced to this pathetic existence. She didn’t know where her so-called ‘niece’ had gone. Until she did, she’d hang around McDuck Manor. After all, Lena was bound to return there sooner or later.

But the psychic device she’d paid for after painstaking work at Funzo’s ought to do the trick until then. She relished Lena’s fear and anxiety. Of course, she knew she’d had no small hand in causing it. But it was hard to completely enjoy it when the putrescent girl insisted on hanging onto what was Magica’s by birthright.

The next time she destroyed her, she’d make it more permanent. She didn’t know how Lena had survived in the first place and she needed to find that out once she had her powers back. In the meanwhile, she had an early shift tomorrow and the only thing worse than living in the forest and being weak and pathetic was working retail.

Seriously. People called _her _evil. Had they ever worked retail with children? That was the worst possible thing she could think of. And she wasn’t even allowed to “accidentally” strangle one of them.

She’d vent her spleen on Lena as soon as she went back to sleep. Lena couldn’t avoid sleep forever…


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had some really bad news irl, so...if updates become sporadic again, that's why.

What Lena needed to do was find another place to crash. She couldn’t risk Violet discovering any more nightmares. Eventually, the other girl would break her down and she couldn’t risk it. So after she’d agreed to the milk and cookies, mostly to shut Violet up, she found a spare bedroom, little better than a small storeroom, and attempted to sleep. She was shaking again and she swore up and down that Magica would not be interfering in her dreams again. 

It was three-thirty according to her phone. If she fell asleep now, she’d have another four and a half hours before she had to be awake. She could handle that. Curling into a ball, she hugged her knees. No more nightmares. Bad dreams would not be coming her way. She wouldn’t let them.

* * *

It was the Shadow War all over again, except Lena was tethered to Webby. She couldn’t speak, not even when the shadows swarmed her best friend. They were crafty, waiting until Webby’s attention was diverted to attack. No matter how many she fought, more appeared. 

“You could protect her if you gave me back my powers,” Magica crooned, appearing at Lena’s side. Lena spun, grinding her teeth. 

“How could that possibly help?” Lena snapped. “You’d just cast me back into the shadow realm.”

“I can’t control the shadows unless you give me back my powers,” Magica said, undeterred. “And wouldn’t it be a shame if something were to happen to Wendy as a result?”

“_Webby_,” Lena snapped. Even as she said that the shadows swamped Webby. Lena rushed forward but it was as it had been before--she couldn’t touch anything outside of herself. Horror suffused her. No matter how fiercely her friend fought, the shadows threatened to pull her under. Webby was soon gasping for breath, struggling and flailing. It didn’t take much imagination to picture her losing, suffocating beneath their weight. 

“Yes, her,” Magica replied. “Or did you want to see her die? Again?”

“Stop it!”

“All you need to do is give in...just once…” 

“No!” 

* * *

Lena awoke by herself in the small room. Everything appeared as it had been and she knocked over a small trash can when she’d fought back to consciousness. Tears streaked her cheeks and she was glad that the small room in which she had found herself had no windows to break. Without Violet here, she shouldn’t be alerting anyone to her nightmares. 

The shadows had almost killed her best friend. And it would’ve been Lena’s fault. No, that was stupid. It was Magica’s plan. But…

She desperately wished she was in McDuck Manor with Webby. Her phone warned her it was five o’clock. It’d take at least two more hours before anyone else woke and then she’d have to wait another hour or so after that before she could check on Webby. But she was fine. She had to be fine. 

Lena swiped at her cheeks harder. Her beak quivered and she rocked back and forth. _Stop crying_. She could almost feel her aunt’s malevolent presence hovering over her. They were linked, weren’t they? Lena was never going to escape her. No matter how much she wanted to flee, Magica held her leash.

Lena sighed, letting her head hit the wall behind her. She could almost feel the yoke about her neck. Magica would whip her into a frenzy and then claim what was hers by right. Lena was only “borrowing” her powers. Sooner or later, she would have to give them back.

After all, Magica was supposed to exist. Lena wasn’t. It reminded her of a quote from a video game.

_“He holds half of Sora's power within him. In the end, he'll have to give it back.”_

She’d have to return Magica’s powers to her. Lena drew a deep, shuddering breath. Like that character, she’d cease to exist. She was a monster, an aberration. At least Violet hadn’t pursued her into the storage room. Or laundry room. Lena didn’t even know where she’d gone--she’d just needed to get away from Violet’s (possibly) well-intentioned comfort. 

She didn’t want to attempt sleep tonight or possibly ever. Willing herself to stop rocking back and forth, she decided to scroll her cell phone. Social media might provide a decent distraction. In the morning, she’d help Violet’s dads with breakfast. She’d ingratiate herself with them and prove to be the perfect guest so that they didn’t throw her out. 

She was positive that if she wound up back on the streets, Magica would find her. Lena was supposed to be a lightsider, a good person now. The only problem was that Lena didn’t believe it. She couldn’t be good if she’d been created from evil. The two didn’t mesh. Lena tugged at her pink streak, unaware that it had turned black. 

She just had to stay up for three more hours. That was do-able. Five o’clock was almost time for the sun to rise anyway. She’d pulled all-nighters before. Trapped in the shadow realm, she’d scarcely slept. Sure, she needed the energy now and the situation wasn’t comparable, but she could stay awake. It was only for three hours.

* * *

She was attached to Webby again, only this time, she was in the ocean while Webby flailed for help. Glomgold had thrown Webby overboard and, just as before, there wasn’t a damn thing Lena could do. Her impotence was maddening and depressing. She was going to watch her best friend drown. 

“Webby!” Louie cried and lunged for her. 

“Seems familiar, doesn’t it?” Magica crooned, standing in front of Louie and blocking his access to Webby. “Haven’t we seen this scene before?”

“Get out of the way, Aunt Magica!” Lena spat.

“Oh, am I in the way? I hadn’t noticed,” Magica said. Looking suitably contrite, although Lena knew it was a gimmick, she offered a hand. The turbulent waves tossed Webby this way and that and she was swallowing water. Lena screamed.

“You can stop this if you give me back my powers,” Magica said. “I’ll let Louie rescue her and it’ll all go back to normal.”

Webby was sinking. It seemed incredible to Lena that she could drown and that Louie wasn’t pushing Magica aside or diving in after her. It was as if the whole world was holding its breath, waiting on Lena’s decision. Magica smiled and it sent a sickening jolt through Lena’s body.

“Would you really rather let her die?” Magica whispered.

* * *

Lena gasped, doubled over. The last image she’d had before waking was Webby sinking beneath the waves for the last time. The mental picture was like a blow to the gut. She was beyond crying now, somewhere in the realm of terrified shock. This time, she would’ve watched her drown as if Louie wasn’t there. 

It was six-thirty. Just a half-hour. That was easy. She’d thought that three hours was easy, but a half-hour? A piece of cake. Speaking of cake, her stomach gave an unpleasant lurch. She wasn’t feeling particularly hungry.

The sun filtered in through the slatted doors and she realized she’d hunkered down in the laundry room. Oh, well. At least it smelled pleasant. It made a nice counterpoint to her nightmares. Lena’s beak quivered. Twenty-nine minutes now. 

She huddled in her sweater. She wouldn’t fall asleep again. She couldn’t afford to. 

She slapped her face. Stay awake, dummy. Stay awake. She wouldn’t fall asleep again. She couldn’t fall asleep again. She couldn’t endure seeing Webby perish again.

* * *

Magica let loose an impressive string of profanities that would’ve gotten her canceled if she’d been on a children’s network. _Lena kept waking up_. She wanted to strangle the shadow with her bare hands. It wasn’t bad enough that she had to work in Funzo’s. No, Lena had to prove recalcitrant. 

Now she couldn’t afford to dedicate any more time to this today. She needed to get ready for her stupid shift and act like she wasn’t a homeless hermit living in the woods outside McDuck Manor. Of course, that’d be easier with her magic, but if she’d had her magic, she wouldn’t be in this predicament in the first place.

Magica snarled, cursing Lena again. She rued the day she’d given that shadow autonomy. 

* * *

“You slept in the laundry room?” Violet queried when they entered the kitchen for breakfast. 

“Yep,” Lena said and offered her a fake smile. “Never slept better.”

“Okay…” Violet said, but, to Lena’s relief, she seemed to buy it. 

“So, what’s for breakfast? We had breakfast for dinner yesterday, so is dinner for breakfast today?” 

“Oh, no,” Stefan said, popping up from behind the counter. “We’re having cereal today. Because Tomas misplaced the egg maker.”

“I didn’t misplace it,” Tomas argued. “It grew legs. And walked.”

Stefan sighed. “Sorry, girls.”

“It’s all right,” Violet reassured them. She grabbed a bowl for herself and then another for Lena. Lena eyed it unhappily. Running herself ragged wouldn’t accomplish anything, but she was too tired to care. She didn’t want to eat. 

She let their chatter drift over her. As soon as it was feasible, she needed to go to McDuck Manor and ensure that Webby hadn’t perished in the night. She was being preposterous, she knew. Magica wouldn’t have touched her. She couldn’t have. McDuck Manor was too well protected for that.

Anxiety doesn’t usually respond to logic.

“We should go shopping,” Tomas proposed and Lena startled, realizing that they’d been talking to her. 

“Huh?” she said. She’d been poking the Cheerios with her spoon. 

“You only have the clothes on your back, right?” Tomas said. “We should at least get you a change of clothing so you can take a shower.”

“You don’t have to,” Lena protested. “I’m fine with what I have.”

“I might have some clothing that would suffice,” Violet suggested.

“Yeah, that’s fine, whatever,” Lena said. 

Tomas stopped and looked into Lena’s eyes. “Have you been sleeping well?”

“Fine. I’ve been sleeping fine,” Lena said. She forced a smile. “Why do you ask?”

“No reason…” Tomas murmured. Lena sighed, relieved. The signs of sleep deprivation wouldn’t hit for a few days anyway. She ought to be able to pull this off for another couple of days. Maybe if she chugged a couple of energy drinks tonight, she’d be able to avoid sleep altogether. It was desperate, but that was where she was right now.

_“Would you really rather let her die?” _Magica hissed in her mind and Lena flinched. 

“Today is also library day,” Violet announced.

“Weren’t you just there?” Lena huffed.

“Yes,” Violet said and smiled. “But the last time was so productive, I thought perhaps I should attempt it again. What do you say? Would you like to go?”

“Pass,” Lena said. “I’ve seen enough of the library with Webby.”

To last her an eternity, she thought. Violet looked like she wanted to argue, but she chose not to. Lena wasn’t sure where she’d go in lieu of the library, but she was done shadowing people (literally). She stifled a yawn and smiled innocently.

“I’m fine,” she lied. She had a feeling she was going to be heartily sick of that word soon.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters are going to be a bit erratic in terms of length (and possibly updating) from here on out. It all depends on my ability to focus, which has been all over the place thanks to my mom's medical issues.

“I thought, since you’re new around here, that you might want to take a tour of the house and spend some time by yourself,” Tomas said. 

“I kinda had a lot of alone time before,” Lena said, not willing to elaborate. She balled her fists into her sweater. Tomas raised his eyebrows at her and she grimaced. Not looking at him, cleaning up after breakfast and putting the dishes into the sink, she explained.

“No one could see or hear me for three months. So it’s not like I haven’t had all the alone time I could’ve wanted,” Lena muttered.

“Three months?” Tomas exclaimed. “That’s horrible.”

“I’m not real,” Lena said and shrugged. “And being banished to the shadow realm was, in some ways, an improvement.”

Tomas stared at her and she had the feeling she’d misspoken. His gaze was intense and disconcerting. To avoid it, she turned on the water, grabbed a sponge, prepped it with soap, and started washing the dishes. Tomas grabbed a dishrag to dry them. She was relieved that he hadn’t asked her how it was an improvement. 

Every once in awhile, Lena looked back to ensure that Magica wasn’t tailing her anymore.

“You know, you’re safe here,” Tomas said and put a hand on her shoulder. “No one here is judging you and no one is going to let any harm come to you.”

Lena snorted. “Yeah, right. I’m not safe anywhere.”

“Let’s pretend for the moment that you are,” Tomas said. “What would you like to do? If you could do anything right now?”

“Talk to Webby,” she said. She said it without thinking. After the nightmares she’d endured, she wanted to ensure that her best friend was healthy and hale. Tomas nodded.

“Why don’t you go see her? I can finish up here.”

“Are you sure? I mean, I can help out…” she faltered. She didn’t really want to help, but she feared that if she didn’t, Violet’s dads would contrive a reason to throw her out. She doubted any of that showed on her face, however. She’d become a master at concealing her emotions. After all, if she were to engage in subterfuge, then she needed to be able to hide with impunity.

“You go on. You talk to your friend,” Tomas said. “Don’t worry--we’ll be here when you get back. Stefan should be done grocery shopping by then.”

So domestic. It felt weird to be a part of this. With misgivings, she left Violet’s house and then memorized the street it was on and its location on said street. She’d need to be able to figure out how to get back. She wasn’t going to say “get home”, because Violet’s house didn’t feel like home. McDuck Manor hadn’t, either. 

Traveling by herself was an odd experience. She knew people saw her and she wasn’t forced to go wherever Webby wanted to go, but it made her feel terribly lonely. She ought to be happy that she wasn’t confined, yet all she could think about was Webby’s voice, the way she bounced around the room, and all the little things that her best friend didn’t even notice she did. All those things that made Lena love her. 

She approached McDuck Manor and rang the bell. Mrs. Beakley answered.

“Oh, hey, Mrs. B,” Lena said, feeling oddly self-conscious. She rubbed at the back of her neck. “It’s me. I mean, you can see it’s me. Duh.”

“Hello, Lena,” she said. “I assume you wanted to see Webby.”

“Yeah…” Lena said. “Is she home?”

“I’m afraid not,” Mrs. Beakley said. “They went off adventuring again. Would you like to come in anyway?”

“Can I?” she asked and Mrs. Beakley opened the gates electronically. Lena walked along the long driveway, thinking about how the last time she’d done this, Magica had possessed her. It was odd that she’d want to be here without Webby, but she didn’t mind spending time with Mrs. Beakley. Mrs. B was a tough old bird, after all.

Mrs. Beakley was there at the door and let her in. 

“I was thinking,” Lena said, as inspiration struck her. “It’s going to be my friendaversary with Webby in a week. We’ve been friends for a year, or, I guess, nine months since I was stuck in her shadow for three months.

“Anyway,” she rushed, as Mrs. Beakley probably had no idea what she was talking about, “I was thinking maybe I could make her a cake.”

Mrs. Beakley smiled at her. “Just as long as you don’t do what Della did, I think we’ll be fine.”

“Do I want to know?”

Mrs. Beakley’s face tightened. “No, not really.”

She led Lena into the kitchen and Lena frowned, spying scorch marks on the ceiling. The stove was new too, but then again, it had been shrunk when the Gyropuddians had attacked. Even if she hadn’t been physically present for some of Webby’s adventures, she’d lived vicariously through her. Then again, considering that Glomgold had almost drowned Webby, it might’ve been safer for Lena that way. 

Ugh. _Glomgold_. She was still upset with him.

Mrs. Beakley was taking out the cake mix and other ingredients. Lena sat on a stool at the counter and watched her work. She had no idea where things were in the cabinets; she hadn’t paid attention to Webby 24/7 in the shadow realm. Sometimes she’d zoned out, especially when Webby was doing something boring.

“Glomgold almost drowned Webby, you know,” Lena said. She was unable to get that nightmare out of her mind. 

“Did he?” Mrs. Beakley said sharply and her eyes flashed. She placed the ingredients down on the counter in front of her. 

“It happened when I was attached to her shadow,” Lena said. “Or, rather, _was _her shadow. For three months.”

“What happened?” Mrs. Beakley demanded. She now seemed much more intent on what Lena had to say than preparing a cake and Lena wondered if she’d made the wrong decision. However, someone else had to know besides her, Webby, and Louie.

Lena told her about how Louie and Webby had gone out fishing in the storm and Glomgold had thrown Webby overboard in a pathetic attempt to get more fish. As she listened, Mrs. Beakley’s countenance grew darker and harder. By the time she finished, Mrs. Beakley looked capable of murder and Lena was almost positive she’d made a mistake.

“Oh, I’m not upset with you, dear. There was nothing you could have done,” Mrs. Beakley said. “But if I see Flintheart Glomgold again...well…”

She smiled cruelly. “Let’s just say the fates won’t be kind to him.”

Compartmentalizing her anger in a way that was, quite frankly, disturbing, Mrs. B turned to Lena. “Now, you wanted me to show you how to bake a cake, yes?”

“Yeah...are you okay?” 

“Quite all right,” she reassured her. The homicidal gleam in her eyes lingered and with a toss of her head, it then faded. Yes, Mrs. B was a tough old bird, but she was also a former spy. And with Webby’s odd knowledge of traps and weapons, where else could she have learned it but from her grandmother? Lena should’ve known better than to mention what had befallen Webby. Then again, perhaps Mrs. Beakley had already known. She did know a great deal without being told, such as the incident with the Other Bin.

Lena wanted to ask about staying here, especially as Scrooge had promised her she had a place in his family, but now didn’t feel like the time to bring it up.

“How are things going here?” Lena said. “I mean, it’s been a day since I was last here, but…”

“Webby’s happier,” Mrs. Beakley said, sensing what Lena was after. “She has a terrible habit of concealing her emotions for fear of upsetting others.”

“I know,” Lena replied as Mrs. Beakley added the flour and then cracked the eggs.

“I’m glad you’re back too. You appear to be happier as well.”

Lena shrugged. “Eh. At least I don’t have Aunt Magica riding me anymore.”

“Why do you call her that? She’s not actually related to you,” Mrs. Beakley said, stirring the mix.

“Back when I was first, created, I guess, she wanted me to feel like I was wanted and that we were close, so she told me to call her ‘aunt’. In the beginning, she was different. But she might’ve been using me the whole time.”

Mrs. Beakley hugged her. This family was big on hugs. She didn’t know how she’d forgotten.

“How’d your little cosplay go?” Lena asked, beak quirking.

“Oh, that,” Mrs. Beakley said and released her. She rolled her eyes. “It turns out that Launchpad’s writing leaves something to be desired. He also has no concept of plot or character development.”

“Wow, Launchpad sucks at fanfics,” Lena said and rolled her eyes. “I never would’ve guessed.”

“Oh, he’s spot on when it comes to Darkwing Duck. It’s just everything and everyone else that he gets wrong.”

“Did you actually record it?” 

“Yes,” Mrs. Beakley said, sounding embarrassed. “Thankfully, the boys haven’t found it yet.”

“I won’t tell if you don’t,” Lena said with a smile.

“Oh, believe me, I won’t be telling anyone about yesterday’s exploits,” Mrs. Beakley said, likewise rolling her eyes. “And I’m hardly going to join Darkwing Duck fan clubs or advertise my liking it online.”

“You go online? I thought you were too old for that stuff. I thought that once you passed a certain age, the internet didn’t let you on,” Lena teased.

“Someone has to keep an eye on Webbigail and the boys online. And yes, I know all about Dewey Dew-Night.”

“Oh god, that thing?” Lena groaned. “Did you know that the harpies attacked Dewey’s face because that was ‘the thing he valued the most’? I swear.”

Lena frowned, thoughtful. “They never had a problem with Webby, though.”

“That’s because I suspect she’d already lost the thing she cared for the most,” Mrs. Beakley said, injecting a somber note into their conversation. Lena nodded. She wouldn’t think it was her that Webby cherished the most--probably Webby’s parents or something else. She wasn’t that vain...or that self-confident.

“You’ve been with Webby since Magica’s defeat, right?” Mrs. Beakley asked as she continued prepping the cake. Lena was watching and trying to commit the steps to memory.

“Yeah, why?”

“Then you were there for the harmonizing.”

“I thought they were trying out for Glee!” Lena groaned. “It drove me crazy! But I know why she was doing it. She was trying too hard.”

“She wasn’t going to forget you, you know.”

“I was afraid she would...I mean, I was okay while she was trying to bring me back from the shadow realm, but when she met Violet…” Lena shrugged.

“You are welcome in this house any time,” Mrs. Beakley said. “And no, Webby would never forget about you.”

Lena was quiet for a minute.

“Donald really can’t sing, can he?” Lena said. “Makes me almost feel bad for the plant.”

“The plant that tried to eat everyone? The one that Dewey claims had no pictures, so it didn’t happen?” Mrs. Beakley said.

“Yeah, that one.”

“Did you ever get a rest while you were in the shadow realm? It sounds like you tagged along on all of her adventures.”

“It was relaxing,” Lena said, shrugging. “I mean, I didn’t have Aunt Magica breathing down my neck, as I said. Anything was relaxing compared to that.”

“Hmm.”

“What?” 

“We’ll have to wait a few hours for the cake to cook. In the meanwhile, was there anything you wanted to do? Or discuss?” 

Lena yawned and covered her mouth. “Sorry. I slept badly last night.”

“Nightmares?” Mrs. Beakley asked.

“Why does everyone just assume that?”

Mrs. Beakley gave her a look that said she wasn’t buying it. Then again, Lena thought Mrs. Beakley had probably witnessed a lot of stuff over the years. 

“Why don’t you take a nap? I’ll wake you when it’s done,” the older duck promised. Lena smiled. If she was in McDuck Manor when they returned, at least she’d get to see Webby again. It didn’t take much encouragement for her to toddle down to a spare room and curl up. Magica couldn’t get inside McDuck Manor, right?

And maybe she could have a word with Scrooge when she woke up.


	6. Chapter 6

“Lena?” Webby queried and Lena bolted upright, looking around guiltily. Though she hadn’t had nightmares this time, she was wary after the last batch. What would have been her heart pounded and she half expected to see Magica lurking over her shoulder. After spending fifteen years with her in that position, it was hard, particularly after just waking up, to recall that she was no longer attached. 

“Oh, it’s you,” Lena said, faking a nonchalant smile. “I wasn’t expecting you.”

“I live here, silly,” Webby said and Lena shifted aside so that they could sit together. Lena had holed herself up in the TV room with the red couch, the one they usually gathered in, and she didn’t know why she was surprised that Webby had stumbled upon her here. For heaven’s sake, she’d put herself here for the express purpose of getting Webby’s attention. Jeez, a night bereft of sleep and she was already cracking up.

“No, I knew that.”

“Are you okay? Granny said you seemed ‘off’. Then again…”

Then again, Lena had been hiding things from Webby for almost their entire friendship. It hadn’t been until Magica had killed Lena that she’d come clean. Lena shuddered, recalling her nightmares, and hugged her knees. Webby hugged her tightly.

“You don’t know where Scrooge is, do you?” 

“He’s grumbling in his office,” Webby said and shrugged. “We were supposed to get to this treasure site first, but Glomgold beat us to it. He’s been tetchy all morning, that loveable rascal.”

“Great,” Lena muttered. So much for talking to him about her living arrangements. If Scrooge was in a bad mood, he’d probably take one look at her and assume she was there to do Magica’s bidding again. He’d been trapped in the dime when Lena had sacrificed herself. Lena didn’t know how much the others had told him. And even if they had exonerated her, she was still Magica de Spell’s shadow. Maybe it’d been a bad idea to come here.

“What did you need to talk to him about?”

“It’s nothing, really.”

She loved Webby dearly, she did, but the girl had no internal lie detector. It made it entirely too easy to mislead her. That didn’t make Lena feel any better, but at least she wasn’t expected to explain herself.

“It’s gotta be something,” Webby persisted. “You can trust me. You know you can. You promised--no more secrets.”

Lena sighed. “Scrooge promised me a place in your family if I helped him against Aunt Magica.”

“He did?” Webby straightened up on the couch.

“Yeah, but…” Lena shrugged. “Maybe he took it back, like with what he said to you.”

“What he said…” Webby flinched. “Oh. On the Sunchaser.”

“I did pay attention when you rambled at the wall at night thinking that I could somehow hear you,” Lena said. “I heard you. Every little bit of it. You were, like, the only thing keeping me tethered here. You were the only person who believed you could bring me back. I don’t think anyone else would’ve cared.”

“Oh…” Webby said and turned to face her best friend. She clasped hands with her. “Is that why you were so upset when Violet appeared?”

“Well, duh, I thought you were replacing me,” she said and shrugged. “Not that I’d blame you. Some kind of friend I turned out to be.”

“You turned out to be the _best _friend,” Webby said emphatically, squeezing her hands. “You died for me. Why would you think I’d replace you?”

“For one, Violet’s all book-smart,” Lena said. “Just like you. For another--I mean, you shoved your friendship bracelet into your pocket and told her it was nothing. Like you didn’t want her to know about me.”

Webby grimaced. “I’m sorry. I never meant to give you the impression that I didn’t care. I didn’t know you were there.”

“It’s not like you had any way of knowing.” Lena shook her head. “It’s not a big deal now.”

“How are you getting along with her?”

Lena shrugged. She’d been doing entirely too much of that lately. “Eh. I mean, she seems decent. She didn’t have to put me up. Her dads want to meet you.”

Webby beamed and it was like sunlight after a cloudy sky. Webby was so bright and effervescent and Lena was so...not. She wanted to pull away but Webby was holding her fast. That reminded her--had Mrs. Beakley ever finished baking that cake? She’d probably have to bake another one before the week was up because she doubted the cake would survive with the triplets.

“Oh, hey, Lena,” Huey called and Lena reflexively jerked as if she’d been caught in the middle of raiding the cookie jar. Or stealing the dime. She wanted to facepalm at her stupid reactions. 

“Hi,” Lena said.

“What are you doing here?” Huey asked, joining them on the couch. Dewey rushed in after him and Louie ambled after, on his phone. Either that phone had phenomenal battery power or he had to charge it often because she was pretty sure Waddle phones didn’t last _that _long and he was constantly glued to it.

“I just came to see you guys. Is that a crime?” Lena asked.

“It’s still weird to see you again. I mean, Magica killed you. Is that offensive?” Dewey said. “I know you’re a good guy now.”

“It’s not offensive,” Lena replied. “It’s what happened.”

“You never fully explained what happened yesterday,” Huey said and pulled out the JWG, presumably to annotate it. Lena rolled her eyes. If Louie was attached to his cell phone, then Huey was fixated on his JWG an unhealthy amount. Dewey didn’t appear to have a comfort object, but he had Dewey Dew-Night, which was worse. 

Webby detailed what had transpired and Lena stifled a yawn. Even with the nap, she remained tired. This felt like fatigue pervading her very soul. If she’d had bones, she’d have felt it in them. Wait, _did _she have bones? She didn’t know how her body structure worked as a shadow. It wasn’t until Violet that she’d started questioning it.

“So, Magica’s amulet’s your power source?” Dewey asked and Lena nodded. Her amulet glowed faintly in her chest.

“It’s _my _amulet,” Lena said, a little testy. “But, yeah. It is.”

“Don’t tell me this is some sort of lesson on the power of friendship?” Louie asked, not looking up from his phone. He’d taken a seat across from her. 

Webby flung herself at Lena and Lena just barely caught her. She hadn’t been expecting the tackle hug but she reciprocated by hugging her tightly back. She felt so much better being solid, with other people to see and hear her; also, most importantly, without Magica looming and prodding her. Plus, hugs were pleasant. Webby squeezed her.

“Please. Those ponies don’t know what they’re talking about,” Lena scoffed. “By the way, Webby, that show is terrible.”

“Yeah, I kinda lost my taste for it after the kelpies,” Webby admitted.

“Boys?” Della called and Lena stiffened. She wasn’t entirely enamored with the triplets’ mother. She hadn’t forgiven her for showing up out of nowhere and then seeming to divide Webby from the boys. Webby needed a mother figure too. Mrs. Beakley was one thing, but she was austere and not always accessible. Plus...Webby was an honorary nephew. 

Della popped her head into the room. “Oh! And you are?”

Oh. Right. She’d never officially met Della.

“Mom, this is Lena,” Dewey said. Della’s eyes widened.

“Oh! I’ve heard about you!” Della said and rushed forward. To Lena’s shock, the older female duck immediately wrapped her in an embrace. What was with this family and hugs? Webby let go so that Della could squeeze Lena once and then release her.

“Sorry. After finding out what happened to you, I figured you could use all the hugs you could get,” Della said, unrepentant.

“I wasn’t the one stranded on the moon for ten years…” Lena said, nonplussed. Realizing that Della would be confused by how Lena knew that, she added, “I was in Webby’s shadow for three months when I was stuck in the Shadow Realm. I heard some stuff. So, yeah, I know who you are.”

Della finally released her and shook her head; she clucked her tongue in disapproval.

“What?” Lena asked, perturbed.

“Isolation is awful,” Della said. She cocked her head as she heard Scrooge calling her from another part of the manor. “I’ll be back later. Boy, Uncle Scrooge is really steamed. This is not gonna be fun.”

With a grimace, she headed out. Lena couldn’t help but feel relieved after she’d gone. The boys and Webby were one thing. Della was quite another. Lena didn’t know what to make of her. She still hadn’t apologized for her absence, as far as Lena had seen, and she also hadn’t explained herself sufficiently. It was like she’d jumped back into the family and expected everything to be the same as if she’d never left.

Lena grimaced. She was in the same boat, except Webby knew why she had vanished.

“Where’s Violet?” Webby asked.

“She went to the library,” Lena said and rolled her eyes. “I’ve been there enough times, thanks. I already memorized your morning routine. You never swipe your card right the first time.”

“You can hang here if you want to,” Huey suggested. “We’re not really doing anything.”

“Aside from staying out of Uncle Scrooge’s way,” Louie muttered.

“If you don’t mind,” Lena replied. 

“Why would we mind?” Dewey asked. “You’re our friend too if you want to be.”

She glanced at Louie. Somehow, she didn’t think that pertained to him too, but she wasn’t going to say anything. If Louie wanted to hate on her, that was fine. She hated on herself enough for two. She knew it was difficult to gain his trust.

“Stay,” Webby entreated and smiled at her. 

* * *

She was sick and tired of stalking her shadow. This was a perversion of the natural state of affairs. She was also tired of her shadow getting hugged and reassured. Yes, she could use her neural interface to spy on Lena in the mansion, seeing as it came with a drone. She’d considered smashing the drone and then grinding the remains under her feet, but that wouldn’t help. Still, Lena being treated as a “member of the family” was infuriating, much like everything with Lena was.

She wanted her powers back from that ungrateful whelp. And then she’d use them to kill her for good. 

Just as soon as she finished her next shift. If she didn’t end up killing someone there, but there were no guarantees.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I said in Immortals, I'm updating early this week. Lucky you guys. XD
> 
> Two actual notes: One, I didn't expect the Della and Lena scene to go quite as it did. But Della's words will have had an impact even if you won't see them until later.
> 
> Also, Stefan predates DuckTales 2017 by about...oh...eleven years. He just seemed like the perfect fit for this fic with his past. You can find more of him in one of my novels (The Spirit Inheritance, which I have to get back to)--I had to tweak his backstory to fit this fanfic.

“So, like I was saying earlier, isolation is terrible,” Della said. After the triplets and Webby had gone off to placate Scrooge or discuss battle plans or whatever it was that the old tycoon wanted them for, Lena was left to her own devices in the living room. Della came back in and Lena eyed her warily. She wasn’t sure how much the boys had told her. Somehow, she doubted that Webby had said anything. Webby didn’t confide in just anyone, even if she did blurt out her secrets.

“Yeah, I get that,” Lena said. She didn’t want to have this conversation with Della. For one thing, she held Della responsible for becoming stranded. For another, she bore a grudge against her for not appreciating Webby. Webby had gone through enough without Della showing up to remind her that she was an orphan. For all Lena knew, the triplets still had their father, even if he was a deadbeat or didn’t know he’d sired three kids. Webby had only her grandmother. Then again, the whole dynamic was supposed to be this giant, meshed family, which begged the question of why Della wasn’t including Webby.

“Huh, rebellious teen,” Della said. “I understand that too. You should’ve seen Donald when he was your age, whatever your age was. He wore all these band t-shirts and dyed his hair blue like some emo kid back when grunge was a thing.”

“What’s the matter with dyeing your hair?” Lena said, defensive.

“Oh, no, nothing,” Della hurried to reassure her. “This isn’t going the way I’d hoped.”

“Well, maybe, if you actually talked to people instead of about them,” Lena shot back. Della looked taken aback but rallied.

“You’re sensitive. I’m sorry. But it also seems to me that you have a chip on your shoulder around me that you don’t have around Webby.”

“That’s because I don’t purposefully exclude people just because they’re not related to me.”

“I don’t...you mean Webby. I’m not doing that on purpose. It’s hard to get to know all of them and make up for ten years. I know something happened to Webby’s parents, but if it makes you feel better, I’ll make more of an effort to get to know her too. I know she’s the boys’ best friend.”

“Honorary sibling,” Lena muttered.

“Right. Look, I know you went through a tough time. I’m sure being attached to Magica de Spell is no picnic. She’s about my age. We grew up with her menacing clan McDuck.”

If Della thought Lena was interested in tales of a younger Aunt Magica, she was sadly mistaken. Lena bristled and moved further down the couch to minimize the chance of their touching. The woman should quit while she was ahead. If Lena had been a cat, her fur would’ve been standing on end in distaste and her tail twitching. Well, her tail _was _twitching, so they were halfway there.

“Lena,” Della said and, reluctantly, Lena turned to look at her. “I’m sorry. This is going all wrong. I just wanted you to know that I’m here if you want to talk. As I said before, I know what it’s like to be alone with no one to talk to or know that you’re even there. It’s like shouting into a void.”

To this, Lena had nothing to say. She agreed, which vexed her because she didn’t want to have anything in common with her. She also didn’t want Della to realize she’d scored a point. Then again, to the older duck, there were probably no such things as “points” to score. Lena shifted uncomfortably.

“I just thought you and I had something in common.”

“You didn’t come from an abusive sorceress, did you?” Lena said, mulish, determined not to like her at any cost.

“No, but I did lose my parents at a very early age. They also elevated me above my brother Donald and hated his speech impediment. They preferred he didn’t talk at all.”

This time, Lena glanced at her and didn’t look away. 

“Sounds like a classic narcissist,” Lena said, but she had to admit, she’d piqued her interest.

“They died when I was small, when I was five, and Uncle Scrooge took us in. I’d always thought that the boys would’ve grown up here, with their uncles, but I was wrong.”

Again, the conversation stuttered to a halt. Lena had no idea what Della expected her to say. Did she think she was going to spill her deepest, darkest secrets at the drop of a hat? Violet seemed to expect so and at least Violet had the advantage of saying Lena was staying with her. Della couldn’t even say that much.

“I’m sorry. I’ll go,” Della said.

“It’s your house,” Lena said and shrugged, pulling out her cell phone.

“Back when I was your age--you’re fifteen, aren’t you?--we didn’t have cell phones to hide behind,” Della chided. 

“How did you survive?” Lena asked sarcastically.

“We talked to each other,” Della said. “I spoke with Webby about Uncle Scrooge’s offer. She wants to talk to him again when he’s not worried about that stupid bet with Glomgold. I can put in a good word for you if you want.”

“Why would you do that?” Lena asked, instantly suspicious.

“I know what it means to feel like you have nowhere to go and no one to turn to. I’m not saying our situations are alike; I’m just saying that I know.”

Lena refrained from rolling her eyes. “Go ahead, put in a good word for me. I’m sure the fact that I’m Magica de Spell’s shadow won’t harm my reputation at all with him.”

“I’ll talk to him,” she promised and then left Lena alone. By now, she figured that Violet was probably finished with the library and she ought to be returning there, but she didn’t want to. All she wanted to do, as improbable as it sounded, was beat a retreat to her space beneath the theatre and hide out, away from prying eyes, supposedly well-intentioned people who thought they knew what was best, and people who wanted to use her as a science experiment. The lights flickered, but thankfully, no one was around to notice.

Burying her hands in her long sweater sleeves, she stalked out toward the front door. 

“You can’t go without saying goodbye!” Webby protested.

“I thought you were busy with Old Man Miser over there,” Lena said. Despite her nap, she was still out of it. She didn’t want to have this conversation with Webby right now. Moreover, she didn’t want to discuss anything with anyone. She wanted to throw her sweater over her head like a hoodie and flee. 

“Lena?” Webby said gently when she didn’t speak for a minute. “Are you okay?”

She could tell her the truth, that Aunt Magica plagued her nightmares and Violet was eager to study her, although she’d also made friendship overtures toward her. She could tell her about Della and that awkward discussion that she hoped never happened again. Or, conversely, she could lie. Lena had plenty of experience in it, after all, and Webby had no lie detector.

“Fine. Why wouldn’t I be?” 

“You were going to leave without saying goodbye…”

“I was going to check up on Violet at the library,” Lena lied. “See if she’s done doing the nerd thing yet. You’re probably gonna be busy here, anyway.”

Webby frowned, contemplative. “Oh, hey. There’s supposedly a talking bear in the woods that I was hoping to lure in. Maybe tomorrow, you and Violet could help with that? Team Magic?”

Lena blinked. “Team Magic?”

“That’s the name I gave us. Do you like it?” Webby asked. Her desire to please was almost painful to behold. Lena felt the walls she normally threw up falling down. Webby had that effect on her. She was too charming for her own good. If she’d done it deliberately, Lena would’ve been able to fend it off. But Webby was just an innocent soul. Then again, if she’d done it deliberately, Lena wouldn’t have betrayed Aunt Magica for her in the first place. 

“I guess…” 

“I can change it.”

“No, no, it’s fine,” Lena said and mentally berated herself. That was becoming a dangerous four-letter word. “We can be Team Magic if you want.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Webby pressed. “No secrets, remember?”

“No secrets,” she agreed, but that didn’t mean that she intended to start now. “I’m just gonna check up on Violet, I promise.”

Webby hugged her tightly and Lena hugged her back. She wished everyone here didn’t try to be so understanding. It made it more difficult to be duplicitous. When they separated, Lena offered her a weak smile. 

“I’ll be back tomorrow,” Lena promised. 

“You’d better be,” Webby teased.

Lena left and wished she had a hoodie to shove her hands into. It wasn’t particularly cold, as Calisota was temperate, but now that she was no longer in the manor, she felt the weight of her charade descend upon her again. It was different this time. She wasn’t committing to subterfuge and betraying her friend for Aunt Magica. This was concealing how much she worried about how Webby and the others perceived her and whether she was as good as she wanted to be. Yes, she was supposed to be a “good guy now”, whatever that meant. Maybe it counted for little. She was still Magica’s shadow.

Head down, she found herself heading toward the waterfront and the theatre. From here, she could hear the Beagle Boys messing around and changed her course. She didn’t know if anyone had discovered her hideout, save for Webby and the boys, and if the Beagle Boys had ransacked her stuff, she would be peeved. On the other hand, maybe a fight was what she needed. It might help to channel her self-loathing into something more productive.

Unfortunately, bad news had spread fast and the Beagle Boys, seeing her ascend to the stage, scattered. Did the whole town know she was Magica de Spell’s shadow? The self-loathing was thicker, hard enough to choke on and she forced it back with great effort. She threw a magical arrow at their backs but it missed. Normally her aim was better than that--maybe her emotions were having an effect on that.

Opening the trapdoor, she returned to her old life. She almost expected Aunt Magica to hiss at her back. Yet when she reached the bottom, all of her stuff was gone. Lena couldn’t stifle an outraged cry. Someone had nabbed her stuff! The plans Aunt Magica had made her scribble on the walls were still there, but any spare clothes, her phone charger, and any personal effects were gone. Lena wrapped her arms about herself and spoke softly to herself.

“Well, this sucks.”

There was a note on her nightstand and she sneered. Had someone thought enough of her to leave her a note? What did it say--” Sorry for helping ourselves to your belongings, but we called dibs and you weren’t around”? 

Lena opened the folded paper and her throat tightened. It was from Webby.

“Hey, Lena. I guess you don’t really need your stuff here anymore and anyway, I figured if--” (“if” was crossed out)--” _when _I bring you back from the shadow realm, you can always pick it up at the manor. Besides, why would you want to live down here anyway? It’s depressing.”

Lena smiled and then it faded just as quickly as it had appeared. Webby had gone down here when Lena hadn’t been conscious to convey her things to the manor. When had that been? Why didn’t Lena remember? Sure, she didn’t remember every single second she’d spent trapped in the shadow realm, but she felt like this was pretty significant. There shouldn’t be gaps in her memories over something so important. 

Heart in her throat, she ascended to the stage and weighed her options. She could go talk to Violet in the library, except she didn’t feel up to that conversation; she could wander Duckburg in search of a distraction, but everyone knew that anything fun cost at least $10 and she was broke; or, she could talk to Violet’s dads. The last option appealed to her more--she had no money and Violet’s inability to convey the right emotion at the right time grated.

Burying her hands in her sleeves, she returned to Violet’s house. Tomas was out, but Stefan was there. He looked up at her entering the kitchen and smiled at her.

“Hello,” Stefan said. “Where did you wander off to?”

“I went to see Webby,” Lena said, shrugging and sitting at the barstools up at the counter. They had a proper table, of course, with chairs, but Lena preferred the barstools. They reminded her of her time abroad. 

“And?” Stefan said. “Or shouldn’t I ask?”

“No, it’s cool. You can ask,” Lena said and shrugged. “I spoke to her.”

“I feel as though there’s a suspicious lack of information to this story, but I’m not pushing you,” he said. “You can talk to me when you feel comfortable enough to do it.”

She nodded. 

“Though I wonder what might be troubling you. You look as if you were sucker-punched.”

“I don’t remember everything from when I was a shadow,” Lena mumbled. 

“Well, it wasn’t a pleasant time, was it? You might be suppressing memories. It may be less a case of forgetting and more a case of avoiding painful memories. I might know a thing or two about that.”

Lena stared at him quizzically. “Really.”

“My aunt pushed me into studies I didn’t want to do and she was a harsh task-mistress. She was never satisfied with my progress and complained constantly that I wasn’t as smart or as gifted as my cousin.”

Lena studied him. Why was he telling her this?

“It took me ten years to get away from her and figure out who I was supposed to be. I don’t talk to anyone in my family anymore because it’s too painful.”

He smiled at her, but it was humorless.

“All I’m saying is that sometimes, there are things you’re better off forgetting and people you’re better off without, even if you think they’re family. A family is the people you let into your life, not the people you’re biologically linked to.”

Lena cast her gaze down upon the counter for a minute. “It took you ten years?”

“She was powerful and manipulative. A lot of people thought I was either exaggerating her abuse or being too sensitive. She gaslighted me and verbally and psychologically abused me.”

He shook his head. “It took courage to leave that situation, as I imagine it must’ve taken courage to stand up to your Aunt Magica. Am I right?”

“Yeah…” Lena said.

“But the scars remain,” Stefan said and turned his back to her to look at the refrigerator’s contents. “Now, do you want lunch or would you rather wait until Violet gets back? When Violet becomes engrossed in her research, she tends to ignore trivial things like sustenance and reasonable curfews.”

He smiled at that, but she saw the pain in his eyes. 

“I’ll take lunch.” She wasn’t hungry, but she didn’t want to keep talking about abusive aunts. Stefan nodded, perhaps sensing her reticence, and set about making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Her stomach rumbled. All right, perhaps she was slightly hungry. She hadn’t had much to eat before and she was newly returned to the land of the living.

“What happened to her?” Lena said after the sandwiches were done. “Your aunt, I mean?”

“Nothing,” Stefan said and his tone was thick with disgust. “Her brow-beaten husband retreated into his inner sanctum of hobbies, my cousins stood by her, and my brother ended up leaving too, but he’s too afraid to make contact because we had this sense she could somehow figure it out. It was like Voldemort--we were afraid for the longest time that just saying her name would bring her attention to us.”

He shook his head. “It was superstitious nonsense, but…”

“I know exactly what you mean,” Lena said. 

“Fear of a name increases fear of the object itself,” Stefan warned. “Don’t give her any more power over you, Lena.”

Lena smiled humorlessly. She’d try, but she didn’t think she’d succeed. Aunt Magica was already in her head, even if she wasn’t attached to her anymore. Somehow, she didn’t think that was going to work. But she didn’t want to dash his hopes.

“It might take a while for you to realize who you were meant to be too,” Stefan said, eating his own sandwich across from her. “But don’t give up.”

“Okay,” he said. “You might want some time to mull that over. I’m going to see where my truculent daughter has gone off to.”

“You’re kidding, right?” Lena said and Stefan flashed her a quick smile.

“Yes. She’s far more likely to state her case in a deadpan tone than argue incessantly with me, but I thought it might amuse you.”

With that said, he stepped out to call Violet on the phone and left Lena to her own devices. She buried her face in her hands and pushed away the sandwich. It was all well and good for Stefan to say he’d repudiated his aunt. His aunt wasn’t also his creator. He hadn’t been created as someone’s pawn.

Man, she hated her life. She knew Stefan had meant well, but he hadn’t helped as much as he’d intended. 

She supposed she ought to stick around and wait for Violet to return. She didn’t really want to, but she couldn’t think of anything else to do with herself. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I enjoyed this chapter too. Poor Lena. XD (Next chapter will probably be more nightmares and then the glimpse we had of Team Magic at the beginning of “Timephoon!”)

Violet had come home with what looked like half of the library. She wasn’t visible behind the stacks of books she carried and Lena stared.

“Do you want some help with that?” Lena asked, watching her stumble and weave her way to the front door. 

“If you’d like,” Violet said and then produced another massive pile of books that she dumped in Lena’s arms. Lena groaned. Naturally, they were all dusty hardcovers and she stifled the urge to sneeze. Ascending the stairs with them in her arms was an experience she didn’t want to repeat--she couldn’t see where to put her feet and had to guess where the next step was. Nonetheless, they managed to reach Violet’s room without incident. Lena put down the books with a groan and stretched, listening to her back creak. She felt like she’d turned a million years old. In other words, like Scrooge McDuck. 

The thought of him made her shudder. Maybe it was for the best that she wasn’t living in the manor right now. Scrooge led to thoughts of Aunt Magica and the dime. Lena hated all dimes now on general principle. They rubbed her the wrong way.

“What _is _all of this? Did you try to take out every book? Are you trying to absorb it all by osmosis?” 

“I was searching for anything that might pertain to magical shadows--”

Lena scoffed. “You’re not going to find anything, nerd.”

“Anyway, I thought it best to start from the beginning and see whether these books mentioned them at all. I grew too absorbed in my research and by the time I realized I needed to leave, I had too many books and not enough time to peruse them. Therefore, I took the liberty of bringing them home.”

“Don’t libraries have a limit on how much you can take home?”

“Normally, yes.”

Lena waited, certain more was forthcoming, yet nothing did. Perplexed, she stared at her. “I’m missing something.”

“The answer we are searching for ought to be contained within one of these tomes,” Violet replied. Lena frowned.

“‘Ought to be,’” Lena repeated. “Yeah, that’s encouraging.”

“In the meanwhile, what has happened since we separated? Have you had any odd magical surges? Any unusual behavior I ought to be aware of?”

“Webby wants us to come over tomorrow to help hook a so-called talking bear, no, and no.”

“A talking bear? That would detract from my research, but I suppose I can spare the time,” Violet mused.

“Do you always have to talk like that?” Lena snapped, disgusted. “So formal and stilted?”

“How would you prefer me to speak?” 

“I don’t know! Like a normal kid!”

Violet sat back on the floor and although she’d proven adept at concealing emotions, Lena could tell she’d struck a nerve. She’d half expected a brainiac response, but Violet didn’t say anything. Instead, the sabrewing looked down, staring at the floor. And now Lena felt bad for having yelled at her. It wasn’t like she was really upset with Violet--Violet was just here. Great, she really _was _turning into her aunt, lashing out at someone because they were convenient.

“I see,” Violet said after a minute had passed. 

“Ugh, all right. Sorry,” Lena said. “I didn’t mean to snap at you. I’m frustrated.”

“Would you like to discuss it?” Violet queried. She scowled. “Or would you rather continue your unhealthy lashing out?”

“It’s not like I’m doing any good at anything,” Lena huffed, hugging her knees. “I don’t know how to be a decent person.”

“You saved Webbigail,” Violet reminded her. “And you kept an eye on her.”

“And couldn’t do a thing to save her!” Lena countered. Her aunt’s words reverberated through her mind and she wanted to bury her face in her hands. 

“You appear to be taking too much on yourself,” Violet observed. “Perhaps it would better if you took a step back and assessed the situation from an impartial viewpoint.”

“Yeah, okay, we can’t all do that,” Lena retorted. She shivered, half expecting her shadow to morph into her aunt. Violet put a hand on her shoulder and Lena glanced down at it and then at the younger, shorter girl. 

“It’s quite all right to feel overwhelmed. This is your second day with your body back and your first day without Magica de Spell hovering over you.”

Lena bit her tongue, tempted to tell her that Aunt Magica was _still _hovering over her, try as Lena might to disregard her. The thought induced a wave of fatigue and Lena stifled a yawn. She had the feeling she’d be doing a lot of that soon. She wasn’t sure how long she could go without sleep. Thankfully, she should have a secret stash of energy drinks beneath a rotted floorboard in her old room, assuming Webby hadn’t raided that too. But why should she? What use did that hyperactive girl have for _more _energy?

“There isn’t anything you’re not telling me, is there?” Violet queried and Lena shook her head. Great, she was back to her old standard of lying again. Oh, well. At least no one could call her out on it.

“Why would you think that?” Lena said and offered her a weak smile.

“Hmm…” Violet said, studying her. She gave up after a minute and pointed Lena toward a pile of books. “Well, we might as well ascertain whether any of these books contain anything useful.”

Lena groaned. “You can do that. I’m going to check on dinner.”

Violet nodded, her beak already buried in a book. Lena rolled her eyes and walked down the stairs. Poking her head into the kitchen, she saw Tomas hard at work creating what looked like lasagna. Her stomach rumbled and she winced, flushing, hoping he hadn’t noticed. 

“Lena!” Tomas called. “Just in time. Did you want to help?”

“Do I have a choice?” Lena asked. “I mean, it looks like it’s either help here or sit with Violet and read through all of those books…”

“You don’t have to. You could sit and mooch on the couch,” Tomas offered. “You don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. You’re our guest here, not our indentured servant.”

Lena’s beak twitched; she wasn’t sure whether she wanted to smile or frown. After a moment, she joined him in the kitchen anyway and grabbed a pair of gloves. Preparing food was a foreign concept to her. Mrs. Beakley had promised to help bake her another cake, at least, but that was different from making lasagna.

“You’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like,” Tomas said. “If you had any doubts. I’d imagine wherever you were before wasn’t very pleasant.”

Lena shrugged. “It was a place to crash.”

But that was about it. And having returned to it, she’d depressed herself. It was dank and smelled strongly of sea salt due to its proximity to the ocean. She’d forgotten how strong the stench had been. Somehow, absence had made the heart grow fonder and returning had reminded her how lousy her situation had been.

They didn’t speak for a while, which suited Lena fine. She didn’t know what to say, anyway, but somehow, the companionable silence was more comfortable. She wondered what this was like to have a family and people that cared about you. True, she had Webby, and she’d seen as Webby’s shadow what being in the McDuck/Duck family was like, but it wasn’t the same. Plus, she could be seen and heard, which was a vast improvement over the last few months.

“Why don’t you tell me about a good memory you have?” Tomas suggested. “I can start if you’d like.”

“I don’t really have any good memories,” Lena demurred. 

Violet, whose beak was still buried in a book, nonetheless walked into the kitchen. Lena didn’t know how the younger girl saw where she was going, but then again, she didn’t know how she’d made it home with that pile of books either. It reminded her of Belle from Beauty and the Beast if Belle were into more macabre stuff. 

“None at all?” Violet queried, sitting down at the table. She finally wrenched her attention away and studied Lena. It didn’t seem like a scientific gaze, full of curiosity, but one borne of pity and compassion. 

“Maybe a few with Webby,” Lena admitted. “But most of my life has been, you know...awful.”

Tomas and Violet glanced at each other and Lena glowered. 

“What?” Lena snapped, growing defensive. “I’m telling the truth. Why are you guys looking at each other like that?”

“It seems you do need a family,” Violet said quietly. 

“Already tried that. Apparently, Scrooge isn’t interested.”

She didn’t intend for her tone to be as bitter as it came out. Violet looked alarmed, eyes wide and beak slightly agape. Lena was positive her magic would’ve flared, but this time, at least, it behaved itself. Not her magic. Her creator’s, her aunt’s. The only reason Lena had anything was because of either Magica or Webby and Violet. She stared hard at the lasagna rather than look at anyone.

“You’re welcome to stay here as long as you want,” Tomas offered.

“You truly don’t have any happy memories before you met Webby?” Violet asked.

“No,” Lena said and although she’d ceased being so abrasive, her voice was tense. “What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?”

“Hardly,” Violet said. “But that must have led to quite an unpleasant upbringing.”

“I didn’t have an upbringing,” Lena said. “I was ‘born’ at this age and with these clothes.”

“You didn’t have a formative period at all?” Violet asked.

“Well, yeah…” Lena said, folding her arms across her chest and then forcing herself to relax them. When she did, she ended up hugging herself and gripping her upper arms tightly. Tomas ceased preparing dinner and put an arm about her shoulders. Lena’s tension rode high and she wasn’t quite at the point where she wanted to tell all of them off, but she still didn’t get why people needed to feel so compassionate toward her. They knew she didn’t deserve it. She was just a spy, a magical tool at best, a pawn at worst. 

Her chest tightened and she remembered what Della had said about feeling alone. It was possible to feel alone surrounded by people too. 

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” Tomas reassured her. Stefan popped his head in and Lena’s fingers dug into her arms. 

“Why are you all being so nice? What are you planning?” Lena demanded.

“Nothing,” Stefan said. His long purple hair had a dark sheen to it. It fell to his shoulders. “I know it’s hard to believe, especially after what you’ve been through, but not everyone is here to get you, Lena.”

“You’re right,” Lena said flatly. “It _is _hard to believe.”

“Why don’t you sit and talk to Violet?” Tomas suggested, shooting a pointed look at his partner. “Stefan can take over from here.”

Recognizing the sign that the adults wanted the room, the girls vacated and relocated to the living room. A large TV took up most of one wall; it was hemmed in with bookshelves everywhere. Why had Violet needed to take home so many books? It was like three-quarters of the Duckburg library was here already.

“I’m sure you’ve noticed that I sometimes have difficulty finding the right tone to strike with you,” Violet said. She’d taken the book with her, but left it abandoned on the coffee table in front of the couch. It was a dark purple couch with two easy chairs flanking it. 

Lena didn’t answer. She curled up into one of the easy chairs and hugged her knees. Violet was watching her.

“I have problems connecting with other children as well. Webbigail is my first real friend; most find my manner of speaking and demeanor off-putting,” Violet said. 

“Well, yeah, if you sound like you swallowed a dictionary and a 1920s etiquette book,” Lena retorted.

“My father offered to take you shopping because I’m certain you would prefer to have something that’s uniquely yours,” Violet said. “Also, you might want to replace the friendship bracelet that I assume Webby gave you? I assumed, when I saw her with one, that you would’ve had its companion.”

Lena stared at the floor. “Aunt Magica made me throw it away.”

Violet was at her side.

“She can’t harm you here,” Violet insisted. 

Lena’s beak quirked. Oh, if she only knew. She didn’t look up at the other girl but instead focused on the Oriental rug on the floor. 

“You do not appear to believe me.”

Lena’s throat was tight. Violet placed a hand atop hers.

“No harm will come to you as long as you are at my house,” Violet promised. She cocked her head at Lena. “Unless there’s something you’re not telling me?”

The overwhelming need to pretend she was normal, that nothing was going on and that she shouldn’t worry them, nearly choked her. If she was such a good person, then she wouldn’t be suffering nightmares with Aunt Magica in them. Since she was, she wasn’t really on the right side, was she? She was deluding herself.

“It can’t get better unless you tell me what’s going on,” Violet said softly, cajoling. “I can help.”

“You can’t help.”

“I can’t if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.”

“I’ll work it out myself,” Lena said and sighed. “Don’t worry about me, Vi.”

Violet looked far from convinced, but she let the matter drop. Perhaps she shouldn’t have. Perhaps with more prodding, Lena might have been convinced to divulge her dilemma. Unseen by either girl, a drone buzzed by the window and then returned to its master. 

* * *

Magica could watch Lena through the drone’s small camera. She was isolating herself again, which was good, but if she insisted on waking herself up before Magica could requisition her powers back, that wouldn’t work. She’d need to step up her efforts.

And that girl Violet was a problem. When she had her powers back, she’d deal with her. She hadn’t believed that anyone could be more noisome than Webby, but here she was. She didn’t know what it was about Lena that made people want to soothe her. The shadow was a brat and an ungrateful one at that. Magica rued the day Webby and Violet had brought her back.

She should’ve pursued her amulet after the staff had broken on Donald’s head. That had been her mistake. If she had, then none of this would have happened. Lena wouldn’t be here again and Magica seethed. 

Her phone rang and she dug it out of her pocket.

“De Spell?” her manager said. “You’re late for your shift.”

Magica covered the speaker and cursed; she didn’t need her manager to hear her and how much she loathed Funzo’s.

“I’m coming,” she snapped once she uncovered the speaker. 

“All right,” the manager said. “Remember, it’s Timmy’s birthday today.”

“It’s always _someone’s _birthday,” she sneered. 

“That’s right,” he said. “And we need our sorceress to help make things extra happy!”

“I’ll show you happy,” Magica hissed.

“That’s the spirit! See you soon!”

Magica hung up and glared at Violet’s living room. Later, vengeance would come and it would be all the sweeter for its delay. 


	9. Chapter 9

“You can’t bed down in the laundry room,” Stefan objected when Lena showed every intention of dragging a sleeping bag in there. “What’s wrong with Violet’s room?”

“Nothing,” Lena snapped. She wasn’t looking forward to another night of nightmares and she hadn’t found her treasure trove of energy drinks. She also didn’t feel like explaining that she never wanted to sleep again. That would entail explaining about Aunt Magica and how Lena was actually a monster that didn’t belong with kind, decent people. 

“Lena,” Stefan said and knelt at her side. He put a hand on her shoulder. “If there’s something bothering you, you don’t have to keep it to yourself.”

Lena’s resistance hadn’t worn down sufficiently for his entreaty to work. Shaking her head, she rose and took the sleeping bag with her, reluctantly, back to Violet’s room. Maybe if she was lucky, Violet would prove to be a heavy sleeper tonight. 

“I find white noise can sometimes aid with sleeping difficulties,” Violet said once Lena had entered and shut the door behind her. 

“Not these kinds,” Lena muttered.

“What was that?” 

Lena merely shook her head. She was almost starting to miss her life as Webby’s shadow. She’d never dreamt as a shadow. Then again, instead of dreaming, she’d blacked out and then returned to herself. Still, at least it hadn’t involved Magica. How sad was it that when she was technically dead, she had been happier? 

Violet studied her. 

“What?” Lena snapped, waspish. 

“I can’t help but feel you’re keeping something back,” Violet said. 

She’d promised Webby no more secrets. She’d promised Violet and her family no such thing. Then again, they’d taken her in. Surely she owed them that much. Conversely, if she really was a monster, then she ought to keep it to herself before they threw her out. Throat tight, she shook her head.

Violet turned on the white noise machine and lay down, watching Lena closely. Lena sighed, curling up in her sleeping bag and turning her back toward her. How long could she pretend to sleep until Violet fell asleep? Could she manage it all night and escape? No, that was foolish. Plus, if she left in the middle of the night, there was no guarantee that she’d be let back in.

Wouldn’t she deserve it? Lena stared at the floor and swallowed hard past a lump in her throat. She’d deserve everything that was coming to her. After all, she _was _Magica after a fashion. With that thought in mind, she attempted to stave off sleep.

It didn’t work. No sooner had Violet dropped off into a quiet slumber than Lena had too. Unlike Violet’s, it wasn’t destined to be peaceful.

* * *

  
  
A vine was squeezing the life out of Webby. It was a stupid plant and Lena wished she had a flamethrower or sheers. She snarled, impotent and flailing about in the shadow realm. She hated this. She hated being reminded of her failures. For all that she’d been trying to keep an eye on Webby, she couldn’t have done anything anyway. 

“Such a shame about Wendy,” Magica crooned, materializing at the plant’s side. Lena hissed.

“But you could save her. All you need to do is give up your powers.”

“That makes no sense,” Lena snapped. She was getting sick of these circular dreams. The flower faded, squeezing Webby tightly before it too vanished into nothingness. They reappeared in a castle fortress and Lena’s chest was tight. Lena balled her fists.

“We should have a little chat, you and I. You _are _my shadow, after all,” Magica said and helped herself to the throne at the room’s head. “It isn’t right to keep you out of the loop.”

“You killed me!” Lena snapped. “Why should I listen to a single word you say?”

“Because we’re similar, you and I,” Magica said. “We’re both seen as monsters. Both condemned for something we can’t control. You lost control earlier--what would happen if you hurt Violet? Or Webby? They would blame you for something you can’t help. You’re tired. You’re out of your element, Lena.”

Lena swallowed hard. She shook as she pushed herself to her feet.

“I’ll never join you,” she snapped.

“You came from me. You can’t escape your destiny. Do you even want to? I’m like your mother, in a way,” Magica said and, by some miracle, she didn’t scowl or pull a face. “I created you. I brought you into this world. Who else but me would understand how you feel?”

Lena hesitated. 

“You’re tired,” Magica said and held out her hand to her wayward shadow. “Come home to me. You don’t have to fight anymore.”

Lena opened her beak to respond, though what she was going to say, she didn’t know; before she had a chance, Violet was shaking her awake. Lena blinked, stunned from the sudden jolt from her dream into reality. She gasped, pressing her hand to her chest where the amulet was. Aunt Magica wasn’t right, was she? Lena hugged her knees and pressed a hand against her cheek. Tears had dampened her feathers.

“Are you all right?” Violet queried. “You were whimpering in your sleep.”

Lena didn’t have it in her to be sardonic. She hugged her knees tighter. Once, when she’d been younger and Aunt Magica had vanished for a short period of time, presumably looking for the dime, Lena had watched a movie called _Tangled_. In some ways, Aunt Magica reminded her of Mother Gothel. Lena had related to Rapunzel. Mother Gothel wanted Rapunzel for what she could get out of her. The same held true for Lena and Aunt Magica.

But she _was _tired of fighting. She was tired of pretending to be something she wasn’t. She couldn’t be a good person. Aunt Magica was right. She’d been created to serve as a pawn to a dark-sider. That was all she’d ever be. Tears pricked the corners of her eyes.

“Lena, please,” Violet said and hugged her. Lena bit the inside of her cheek.

“It’s nothing,” Lena said when she could speak. “Just a few bad dreams. Don’t worry about it.”

“Did you want to discuss them?” 

“No, I’m good. I’m pretty sure they won’t come back,” Lena lied. 

Violet frowned, looking less than convinced. “Tell me if they’re troubling you.”

“I promise.”

She needed to stop breaking promises. But promising Violet was different than promising Webby, wasn’t it? Lena lowered her head. 

Violet crawled back into bed and Lena hoped Violet would fall fast asleep soon. As for herself...her chest ached. Was Aunt Magica right? Had she always been right? Family was supposed to help you, not hurt you. All Aunt Magica had ever done was belittle her, except in the very beginning. Lena didn’t know. Her throat was tight and she pressed her face into her sleeping bag. She wanted this to stop. She wanted everything to stop. 

She wasn’t alone. She wouldn’t be alone for a while, but she felt horribly lonely, regardless. She couldn’t tell anyone about this. After all, she deserved it, didn’t she? 

Della’s offer returned to the forefront of her mind. Surely the older woman hadn’t meant it. After all, Lena wasn’t family. Lena was just...a hanger-on. Biting the inside of her cheek again, Lena pushed the sleeping bag flap aside and glanced over at Violet’s bed. Violet appeared to be fast asleep.

Creeping toward the kitchen, she heard voices. Tomas and Stefan were talking, albeit in low tones to avoid rousing their daughter.

“I’m worried about her,” Tomas said. Lena poked her head around the doorway and then ducked back, wary of being seen.

“It’ll take a while for her to trust anyone enough to confide in them,” Stefan said. “You know how long it took me. And my aunt wasn’t even magical. Just, well…”

He uttered a curse word that Lena felt suited Aunt Magica too. Her beak twisted into a wry smile.

“That goes without saying,” Tomas snorted. “Still, I’m worried about her. She’s holding so much back. It’s not good for her.”

“You can’t force it out,” Stefan objected. “She’ll come to us when she’s ready.”

Or not. Lena snorted. She had no intention of telling Violet or Webby. Why would she open up to complete strangers? True, they were Violet’s dads, but that didn’t mean she was going to talk to them about personal matters. And Della...why was Della’s invite still ringing around in her head?

“Lena?” Stefan called. He ducked around the doorway and Lena hid against the wall. Her heart pounded. She shouldn’t have been eavesdropping, especially as it’d been about her.

Stefan turned his head and spied her up against the wall. “Come here.”

Reluctantly, she followed him back into the kitchen. 

“You look like you haven’t slept,” Tomas commented. “Would you like a glass of warm milk?”

Lena shook her head.

“Nightmares?” Stefan said sympathetically. She wished he wasn’t so kind to her. With everything Aunt Magica had accused her of doing and being, she wasn’t equal to it. If she didn’t feel so wretched, she might consider returning to her lair underneath the theatre. Could Aunt Magica find her there? She’d found her here, after all.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Lena mumbled.

“You don’t have to right away,” Tomas soothed. “But we’re here for you if you need us.”

Ugh, why was everyone insistent on that? Why didn’t anyone see her the way she saw herself? Why didn’t anyone understand that she wasn’t normal and therefore, shouldn’t be treated that way? Why did they have to be so caring? 

She nodded, not intending to follow up on that either. There were so many falsehoods and lies going on that she almost felt like she had an argumentative, bossy shadow at her back again. She offered them a weak smile, told them she was going back to bed, and then lingered in Violet’s room, trying to decide whether she wanted to return to the theatre or not. In the end, she decided against it, because she didn’t want to make the others worry about where to find her. She wasn’t worth that.

Lena lay back down on her sleeping bag and stared around her. She wasn’t worth anything. She was a monster, plain and simple. No one should be so compassionate toward her. Tears pricked the corners of her eyes again and she swiped at them. She didn’t agree with Aunt Magica, not quite yet, but she could feel her defenses starting to crumble.

* * *

  
  
“Hello!” Webby called, all bright and shiny and happy upon seeing her two best friends at the door. Lena didn’t feel in the slightest bubbly or chipper. She wished she could project that aura, but she’d never been _that _good at subterfuge. Violet inclined her head, seeing as she was back to conveying little to no emotion, and Lena forced a smile. Webby was too excited about their latest enterprise to notice how fast it slipped from her beak.

“Right, so, Lena, you’re the bait,” Webby said. “I’ll be the muscle and Violet, you can read the incantation. We want to bind the bear so he can’t hurt anyone, but also to keep him in the manor instead of running away.”

“I’m the bait. Why does that sound familiar?” Lena muttered darkly. 

“You don’t have to be the bait if you don’t want to be,” Webby said. She tilted Lena’s chin up. “Have you been sleeping okay?”

“Fine. Why does everyone keep asking that?” Lena snapped. Webby blinked. “Sorry. I just had a couple of nightmares. No big deal.”

“You can talk to me, you know,” Webby said. Another thing she was tired of hearing. She wasn’t going to speak with anyone about this, because as far as she was concerned, it was _her _problem. She’d fix it on her own. Or not, as the case might be.

Lena nodded, rather than offer a reply. It seemed safer that way. She took the proffered fish and headed out into the woods near McDuck Manor. She felt ridiculous, but that was a sight better than unwanted or like garbage, so she supposed she’d take it.

“Here, you giant talking bear!” Lena said, waving the fish around. “This is ridiculous. I’m not gonna attract…”

She trailed off. A huge, slavering bear stood before her and Lena’s knees went weak. If there was one thing worse than facing Aunt Magica in her nightmares, then it was a bear with possible rabies eyeing her like a duck was its new favorite meal. Lena bolted, the bear rushing after her. 

“_Webby!” _Lena cried. The bear was gaining on her. “Any time now would be great!”

She rushed back into the manor. “Any time at all!”

The bear dashed after her, and Lena was grateful that at least she wouldn’t need to guide it up the stairs. That gratitude only lasted as long as it took for the bear to gain on her. She was sweating profusely.

Webby closed the door after her and they hastened into Webby’s room. If the bear talked, it gave no indication, seeing as all it did was growl and glower at them. It also really wanted the fish in Lena’s hand. Lena’s heart was pounding so hard that she thought it might burst out of her chest. 

“Okay, hang on, I’ve found the spell,” Violet said.

“That’s _such _a relief,” Lena spat sarcastically. “Now all you need to do is hold off an angry bear. Oh, wait, no, that’s me because I’m the bait!”

Webby had grabbed a rope to secure the bear. Meanwhile, Violet had commenced chanting and Lena stood there, feeling ridiculous and also petrified, with the bear glaring down at the trio. Webby stretched, almost doing a split with how far apart her legs were. Meanwhile, Violet’s gaze was upon her book and Lena focused on her almost certain death. Again. She wasn’t sure which was worse--Aunt Magica killing her or being mauled to death by a ferocious bear. Didn’t she get a choice in the matter?

Scrooge opened the door for a split second and she didn’t have time to glance his way or beg for his assistance before he closed it again. Outside, she heard the wind howling. She might’ve been crazy, but she could’ve sworn it’d been a pleasant, peaceful day an hour ago, if not less. There’d been no indication of a storm brewing.

Webby successfully tied the bear up and Violet finished her incantation. Lena lowered her arms, sensing that the danger had passed. The bear, despite looking furious, remained on the floor. It wasn’t even snapping its jaw at them.

“So?” Lena said and poked at it with the slimy fish Webby had given her. “When does it speak?”

“It was supposed to speak already…” Webby said uncertainly. “Violet, you did the incantation right, didn’t you?”

“Of course,” Violet said. “Yet it appears to be mute.”

“And ticked off,” Lena muttered.

Webby frowned, hopping off the bear’s back. “Louie told me that there was a Bigfoot-like creature in the woods. Maybe this isn’t it.”

It might’ve been Lena’s imagination, but the bear scoffed. No, it wasn’t her imagination, as the scoff was accompanied by the bear rolling its eyes. No normal bear would react that way. Lena folded her arms across her chest and tossed away the fish. Like Louie, she sensed a grifter.

“You’d rather have cooked fish, wouldn’t you?” Lena said. “Don’t play dumb with me. I know you understand me.”

The bear muttered something indistinguishable. 

“It _can _speak…” Violet said.

“What was that?” Lena demanded. Her amulet glowed in her chest.

“Gavin didn’t tell me that the girls would be more difficult,” the bear grumbled.

“Who’s Gavin?” Webby asked.

“So all of that growling and threatening to clobber me was for show?” Lena snapped.

The bear had the good sense to look sheepish. “You were the one waving food in front of my face. It’s not my fault.”

“Really?” Lena snapped. Her nerves were dangerously frayed from two nights of nightmares and she wasn’t sure how much she could rein in her temper. She was shaking in anger, out of proportion to his level of deception, but it lacked a proper outlet otherwise. She could hardly lash out at Webby or Violet. The bear would be safer.

“So you just decided, ‘Oh, hey, let’s scare the crap out of Lena instead, because she won’t mind?’” Lena spat.

Violet was studying her again.

“It appears your nightmares are having an adverse effect on your behavior,” Violet observed.

Lena scoffed and felt self-conscious. “No. I just don’t appreciate being lied to.”

Webby was studying her closely, scrutinizing her as Violet was. It was enough to make Lena want to confess, but Aunt Magica’s words stayed her. They wouldn’t understand. They wouldn’t want to befriend a monster. Webby didn’t know what she was getting herself into. Lena’s throat tightened, anger evaporating and replaced by misery. 

“What do we do with him now?” Lena said flatly when she could speak again.

“We should study him and take notes before releasing him back into the wild,” Violet proposed. 

“Are you okay? You can tell me anything,” Webby said and cartwheeled over to her best friend to take her hand. “I promise not to judge you.”

“Fine, I’m fine,” Lena mumbled. She felt the furthest thing from it. She also had no interest in studying the bear. As far as she was concerned, she’d rather bed down somewhere in the manor and hide. However, the storm appeared to be worsening outside. It whistled and howled.

“We should probably get going,” Violet said.

“Aw, but you just got here,” Webby objected.

“If this hurricane persists, we would be trapped here for who knows how long?” Violet pointed out. “My dads would be worried about us.”

“Speak for yourself,” Lena muttered. She was rubbing fish guts on herself and she cringed, wiping it on her sweater.

“You could stay here,” Webby proposed. They poked their heads outside of Webby’s room to spy Launchpad knocking windows out instead of nailing boards across them. Webby groaned.

“Yeah, pink, I’m gonna have to side with Violet on this one,” Lena said. She hugged Webby fiercely and Webby hugged her back.

“Don’t forget--you can tell me anything,” Webby said. “Don’t be afraid.”

Lena’s beak twisted. She couldn’t manage a smile. Instead, she nodded, her throat oddly tight. Something was definitely brewing here and while it’d probably be calmer at Violet’s house, it felt a little like cutting off a lifeline to leave McDuck Manor right now.

Outside, the wind was fierce and plucked at their clothes. It threatened to push them backward and leaves and detritus flew through the air. It was a struggle to make it across town to Violet’s house, where Lena found that her dads had properly boarded up the windows. Once they got inside, the door slammed shut behind them so loudly that Lena startled, glaring at the door for surprising her. 

“I’m glad you two are home,” Tomas said. “We’ll have to huddle in the hallway, where there are no windows, just in case. This freak hurricane really is something.”

“I believe it’s stronger near McDuck Manor,” Violet commented.

She and Tomas talked while Lena tuned them out. Why had she agreed to accompany Violet? Oh, right, Launchpad knocking out windows instead of boarding them over. Still, she wished she were back at McDuck Manor now. She’d felt safer there than here. Safety was an illusion, she knew, especially when she possessed Aunt Magica’s powers. If you really wanted to be technical about it, her continued existence was an illusion when Magica could wipe it out at any time.

Or, rather, she could if she had her powers. But they belonged to Lena now. Or did they? Hadn’t Lena stolen them by chance? Morose, Lena hugged herself again. She didn’t know and she felt singularly useless. The only thing her life had been designed to do was to steal Scrooge McDuck’s number one dime. Now that that escapade was over, her life had no purpose. She wasn’t protecting Webby, Violet and Tomas had forgotten she was there, and she just existed. What good did that do anyone?

She snuck into the laundry room, seeing as no one paid her any mind. Hugging her knees, she rocked back and forth once the door was closed and concealing her. She was just so tired of fighting all the time…

_“Come home to me. You don’t have to fight anymore.”_

How tempting that offer seemed, even now that Lena was awake. Aunt Magica was the big bad in Lena’s nightmares, but she had also brought her into being. Once upon a time, she’d even cared for her like an aunt to a niece. Once upon a time...Lena’s beak twisted into a weak smile. _Once upon a time, we fell apart…_

Someone knocked on the slatted wood doors and Lena jumped, reaching for her magic without thinking about it. She willed herself to relinquish her magic, knowing that her aunt wouldn’t be so bold as to attack her within Violet’s house. McDuck Manor was another matter, but she ought to be relatively safe here. “Relative” being the operative word here.

“Lena?” Stefan called and opened the door. Lena looked up, feeling oddly guilty. 

“While I appreciate the security that a washing machine and dryer can provide,” Stefan said dryly, “I’m not certain that they’re great company.”

Lena flushed. “Sorry. I didn’t think you’d notice.”

“Ah, yes, when Tomas and Violet begin speaking of esoteric things, I can understand the temptation to tune out.”

He sat down beside her. 

“I’m not going to offer to let you talk to me about whatever you’d like, because I sense that lecture would go nowhere right now.”

Lena smiled weakly. “I appreciate that.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to take me up on my offer to go shopping? I’m sure you’d like a change of clothes at least. Also, you and Violet aren’t that close in size, no offense.”

Lena’s heart fluttered, taken off guard by his offer and generosity. Before, she’d never had anyone spend money on her. Whatever she’d needed, she’d either bought through Aunt Magica’s funds or stolen. The latter she wasn’t about to divulge to Mrs. Beakley any time soon, no matter that the old bird seemed to be warming to her. She didn’t need to be accused of being a bad influence again. The idea of losing Webby now, after everything, would be like a mortal blow.

“Okay,” she said, surprising herself by agreeing. “But not right now.”

“Of course not,” he replied and smiled. “I’m not feeling that adventurous. Are you?”

“I don’t know,” Lena said. “I’ve heard that life is like a hurricane, here in Duckburg.”

“That line sounds oddly familiar,” Stefan said, smirking. “But I can’t say where I’ve heard it before.”

Lena found herself warming up to him. She patted the washing machine behind her. “So, when was the last time you depended on a washing machine to protect you?”

“When I stained my sheets and I knew my aunt would throw a fit if I showed up with dirty sheets when she did her daily inspections,” Stefan replied promptly. “That washing machine was ready to throw down for me. Or maybe it was just ready to fall over. To be fair, it was quite old.”

Lena surprised herself again by laughing.

“You know, we can get art supplies too,” he said. “It’s been a while since I’ve drawn and I feel myself wanting to visit an art and crafts store. What about you? Any projects you’ve had on the back burner?”

“I could make friendship bracelets,” she said and felt stupid for saying so. “I mean, I could, but who does that any more?”

Stefan reached inside his shirt and produced a frayed necklace with a pendant at the end. “My first friend made this for me as a pick-me-up after my aunt upset me. I’ve long since lost contact with him, but I keep this around anyway, to remind me that there are people who care about me out there.”

“So it’s not stupid?” Lena murmured.

“Not at all,” he replied. 

They sat in amicable silence for a minute while, outside, the winds howled. Tomas and Violet were still discussing whatever boring conversational topic had caught their attention and Stefan was studying his necklace. She supposed he hadn’t replaced the thread because it reminded him of his friend and he didn’t want to lose one more connection to him. It was sweet and it made Lena miss the friendship bracelet Webby had made her all the more. She cursed Aunt Magica for making her discard it.

“There’s not a lot of room to stretch out in here,” Stefan said. He glanced over at her. “I suppose there is if you’re not six feet tall, though.”

“You can fold yourself up,” she snorted. 

“I could,” he said. He snorted back. “But I’d be uncomfortable. I see the shapes you kids contort yourselves into and I’d love to mimic you, but I’d be in pain for a week afterward. Don’t get old.”

Lena smirked. “I wasn’t planning on it.”

“You know, this is the first time Violet’s been this animated about a possible friend,” Stefan continued. “You and Webby have made her very happy, even if you don’t agree.”

Lena gnawed the inside of her cheek. She didn’t see how; she hadn’t exactly been charitable to her. In fact, she could stand to show some more gratitude.

“Don’t worry so much about how you appear to her. She likes you and Webby how you both are,” he added. “You don’t have to try to fit in. You’re good enough.”

“Am I?” she wondered aloud.

“You are,” Stefan said and put a hand on her shoulder. Despite his kind words, it’d be a while until she agreed with him and even then, it needed to be said via Webby for her to accept it.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter this time. And I need to work on this series because this is the last chapter I've written in over a week. XD

Another night without sleep. Lena felt like the walking dead. Her footsteps dragged as she walked up the driveway toward McDuck Manor. The triplets and Webby should be out and Mrs. Beakley had agreed to let Lena try her hand at baking a cake, provided she didn’t ask Della for assistance. Lena hadn’t asked--she wasn’t sure she wanted to know. 

When she arrived, Mrs. Beakley took one look at her and frowned. 

“What?” Lena snapped. She stifled a yawn and suppressed the temptation to rub her eyes. Mrs. Beakley’s eyes narrowed.

“You haven’t been sleeping.”

“I’ve been sleeping,” Lena said, defensive. 

“No, you haven’t. You’re dragging your feet as you walk. Your eyes have bags beneath them. You’re moving slowly because you’re exhausted and don’t have the energy. Don’t presume to tell me about children.”

“I’m not a child,” Lena snapped, feeling waspish. “I’m a shadow.”

“You’re a child. You’re going to take a nap. I will bake the cake. You can decorate it when I’m done,” Mrs. Beakley said. She put a hand on Lena’s shoulder. “I’m not saying this to be cruel. You will feel better after a nap.”

Lena laughed humorlessly. “Whatever you say. I bet I won’t.”

Mrs. Beakley frowned deeper. They were standing in front of a new oven; whatever Della had done must’ve destroyed the last one. Lena’s eyelids drooped and she covered her mouth when she yawned. She’d gone so long without sleeping well that she was occasionally blacking out. Not for very long, only a minute or two at the most, but sleep deprivation tended to get worse before it got better.

Lena hadn’t had a proper night’s sleep since she’d come back from the shadow realm. Every single night, Aunt Magica had appeared to coax, cajole, threaten, or entreat her to return her powers. The worst part was that Lena’s defenses were crumbling. She didn’t know whether there was a point in fighting it anymore. Lena _was _Magica. And she was so very tired of fighting.

“I promise I won’t tell Webby what’s wrong, but you must talk about it,” Mrs. Beakley warned. “Bottling it up is worse.”

Again, that acrid laughter burned in Lena’s throat. “That’s what you think. I’ve spent my whole life doing that. I’ve got it covered, Abbey Road.”

“Nightmares?” 

She was determined, apparently, to ferret out the truth. Stefan, Tomas, and Violet had all tried. Webby had given it a few moments’ worth of effort but been distracted. Lena sensed that Mrs. Beakley would not let the topic slip so quickly. What bothered Lena more was that the older duck seemed genuinely concerned. Why? She was Magica de Spell’s shadow. She wasn’t a child, despite what Mrs. Beakley thought. 

Maybe before, when she’d had a proper night’s rest, she could have thought her way out of this. Now, drained to the dregs, she had nothing. She couldn’t think of any distractions that might put her off the scent. Her shoulders sank.

“You promise you won’t tell Webby?” Lena asked.

“I’ll keep it between us until you tell me I can tell her.”

“Yeah, it’s nightmares,” Lena mumbled. “Every time I try to sleep. I’m so sick of it.”

She wanted a dreamless sleep. That was too much to ask. A very small part of her, admittedly a part she would never confess to Webby, wanted to sleep and not wake up. What was the point if she was destined to become Magica? After all, they were family. Lena was meant to take her aunt’s place. 

Tears pricked her eyes. In her heart, she knew she was nothing like Magica. And that was the problem. She couldn’t be dissimilar to Magica and yet, be destined to be her. Clearly, there was something wrong with Lena. It was a poison that needed to be purged. _She _was a poison that needed to be purged.

_Get it together, Lena. She’s an ex-spy. She’ll be able to read your thoughts or your body language. Or whatever it is ex-spies do._

Mrs. Beakley hugged her and Lena’s beak twitched. She’d forgotten how gung ho this family was about hugs. While in her embrace, she worked at regaining control. It took longer than it ought to have, probably due to sleep deprivation. When Mrs. Beakley released her, the mask was back in place.

“Take a nap,” she repeated. “I’ll retrieve you when the cake is done.”

Lena nodded, too tired to gainsay her, and shuffled off toward a nearby living room. She didn’t want to sleep, but Mrs. Beakley wasn’t going to let her scarf down an energy drink, either. She doubted they had any in the house. Webby’s grandmother seemed like just the sort of severe old lady not to keep any.

She crashed onto the couch and landed facefirst. She didn’t realize she was crying until she felt wetness on the pillows. Weak, that’s what she was. Aunt Magica would’ve reprimanded her for it. She wasn’t evil. She was good. But she couldn’t be good if she was from Magica de Spell. She didn’t know. They had a sleepover planned tonight and Lena would do her best to convince the others that she was a good person now. Maybe, in the process, she’d be able to fool herself into thinking it too.

She slipped into nightmares so easily that she could have been forgiven for thinking that reality was the dream and nightmares were the reality.

* * *

  
  
Magica was waiting for her when she arrived at the Money Bin. It looked as it had when Aunt Magica had ruled over Duckburg and ensnared Scrooge in his number one dime. As a result, Lena approached her aunt while her aunt sat in her throne; it felt like Lena was a penitent peasant. The juxtaposition, Lena was sure, was on purpose. Lena couldn’t even get within a few feet of the throne without needing to stop because of the steep incline. As a result, she had to stare up at her aunt.

“Hello, my little Lena,” Aunt Magica said, seeming to be in a magnanimous mood. “It feels like it’s only been a few hours since we last spoke.”

“Don’t you have better things to do than stalk me in my dreams?” Lena spat.

Magica only smiled. She shifted into a large, green bear and Lena screamed, stumbling backward. The money shark had resurfaced from the Bin and Lena backed away faster, scurrying, her heart in her throat. No. Not again. Aunt Magica advanced, quickly taking up the ground that Lena had vacated. It wasn’t a tactical retreat. It was a rout.

“Run,” Magica hissed and then howled, laughing hysterically. Lena bolted, swallowing past a lump in her throat. She tripped over money in her haste to flee. Magica continued cackling, sending chills down her spine. She transformed into a wolf and landed hard on Lena’s chest. The breath was knocked out of her and Lena gasped, back striking cold, hard cash. Why did Scrooge keep all of his money in coins? That was so impractical. And stupid. Coins were worthless compared to dollars. 

Her aunt snapped her jaws near Lena’s throat and Lena kicked her aunt’s stomach, sending her flying backward. Aunt Magica arrested her development mid-flight and pounced again, slamming Lena’s head against the coins. Lena saw double and tears pricked her eyes. She told herself she wasn’t afraid, that this was a dream and her aunt couldn’t really hurt her again. Couldn’t kill her again. 

Lena cursed Magica out and Magica stopped, snorting.

“Where did you learn such language? Certainly not from me.”

“You should hear what Scrooge calls you,” Lena spat, scrambling back again. 

Magica transformed back into her normal self and scoffed, unperturbed by the epithets. “You’ll succumb to it eventually, Lena. Why not make it easy on yourself? Give me what I want and you can come home…

“You can’t stay at Violet’s house forever. And you don’t have a place at McDuck Manor. Why fight it? You’re just a guest. That’s all you’ll ever be. _I’m _your family. Not them.”

Lena paused. She was right. Violet couldn’t possibly let her stay there forever. And when she grew tired of her, as she was bound to, she’d kick her to the curb. Scrooge hadn’t made good on his promise to let Lena become part of the family. Lena’s only relative was Magica de Spell. Magica offered Lena her hand and Lena stared at it for a long moment.

“Come home, to me,” Aunt Magica implored. “You can finally rest.”

Lena turned to face her and slowly raised her hand to put it in her aunt’s palm. As she did so, someone shook her hard. Lena faltered again and her eyes flew open. Mrs. Beakley was sitting on the couch beside her. She gasped. A dream. It’d just been a dream. Magica wasn’t here. 

“Lena, dear, you were screaming. I had to wake you.”

“Stupid nightmares,” Lena grumbled.

“Magica can’t hurt you here,” Mrs. Beakley said. “Now, come on. Wouldn’t you like to decorate the cake?”

_“Come home. To me. You can finally rest.”_

Lena’s throat was tight as she nodded. She let Mrs. Beakley guide her back into the kitchen and pretended everything was normal. She even managed to muster fake smiles and convince the old duck she had everything under control. As she did, however, she was cringing on the inside. She had almost succumbed to Magica’s sway. 

And the worst part of it was that if she asked once more, just once...Lena might do it. 

* * *

Magica hissed. She’d been thwarted, this time by the help. Still, there was potential here. Lena showed every sign of caving. All she needed was a little push to expedite her decision. Magica had overheard that there was to be a sleepover here tonight, which meant that the kids would be gathered and might keep Lena from waking until Magica’s ploy succeeded. 

And then, well, who cared? She would destroy Lena at her leisure. No one needed a shadow that talked back and had free will. Magica nodded to herself. 

McDuck Manor lay on ley lines, a veritable fount of them. It was frustrating not to be able to tap into them or in her current state, to sense them. Lena would have no difficulty employing her magic within the manor, which was what Magica was counting on. She smiled. 

_“Come home. To me. You can finally rest.”_

Magica cackled. “You can finally rest, my dumb, dumb little Lena. In pieces.”


	11. Chapter 11

“I wish you’d told me sooner,” Webby chided. They were sitting in Webby’s room again, this time sans the boys. Despite her triumph over Aunt Magica, Lena remained tired. She suspected this much sleep debt wouldn’t be ameliorated within a few scant days, let alone a few hours. She didn’t want to fall asleep in the middle of the conversation. 

“I thought I was a monster, pink,” Lena said, conveniently leaving out that she still felt that way. Sometimes, she was insanely grateful that Webby and Violet couldn’t pick up on her thoughts. She’d be in trouble if they could. Webby took her hand and intertwined their fingers.

“You’re not. And I know what you’re thinking. You’re never going to be her. We’re here for you. We’re your friends. You can tell us anything,” Webby said.

“Was this why you were sleeping in the laundry room?” Violet queried and Lena nodded, grimacing.

“Yeah...I didn’t want to disturb you,” Lena admitted.

“But isn’t the laundry room cold and windowless?” Webby asked. “Ours is.”

Lena shrugged. She hadn’t thought she deserved any better. Unable to respond, she cast her gaze downward and both girls hugged her. She allowed herself to be hugged and tried to ignore the lump in her throat. They cared so much about her. She wasn’t worthy, but she would strive to be.

Maybe there was a method in the future in which she could repay them. She just hadn’t encountered it yet.

“Lena,” Webby insisted. “You have to tell us these things.”

“I thought I was bothering you…” Lena said. 

Webby released her hand and hugged her tighter as if she could put all of Lena’s broken pieces back together again. Lena’s throat grew tighter and she rested her chin atop Webby’s hair. All of the stress she’d endured the past week seemed to ebb away. Hopefully, Aunt Magica had returned to whatever hell she’d crawled out of and would leave her alone. Lena wouldn’t count on it.

“You’re never a bother,” Webby soothed. “Never. Don’t think that way.”

“Kinda hard not to, pink, but I’ll give it a shot,” Lena said with a watery smile. She scrubbed at the tears on her cheeks and Webby put her at arm’s length so she could thumb away Lena’s tears. She was aware of Violet watching them and although Lena hated displaying such weakness, she also knew there was nowhere else she wanted to be right now than with the two of them. 

“Once you’ve calmed down,” Violet said. “We should learn how to harness that magical energy to prevent future mishaps.”

It took a second for the words to penetrate. She’d seldom used magic unless she had to, which partially explained her problems with it. That and she’d tuned out every lecture Aunt Magica had given her about it. In her defense, Aunt Magica tended to drone on a lot. Lena couldn’t be expected to remember everything.

“I guess,” Lena said.

“It’s a good idea,” Webby said, springing to her feet. “Ooh, let’s go to the library!”

“You two are such nerds,” Lena said, suppressing a groan. She’d seen enough of the Duckburg Library to last her a lifetime, but there was no telling them that. They’d already sprung into action and Lena had no choice but to follow along. She rolled her eyes. While she knew Webby would probably pick an exotic and dangerous locale for her wedding in the distant future, she had the feeling that Violet would choose to be married in a library. Because she was such a nerd.

Someone save her from the nerds before they got any worse. Her beak twitched toward a smile. Maybe she didn’t want to be saved at all. Maybe she was just fine where she was.

* * *

Violet had all sorts of plans to enact regarding Lena’s future magical exploits. When Lena explained that she had seldom used magic and liked to avoid it when possible, Violet had reminded her that doing so had grave consequences. Lena thought of dragging them all into her nightmare and shuddered. That had had a happy ending, but it could have gone badly awry, too. 

“You’re still putting too much pressure on yourself,” Webby soothed. They had secured a private study room and Violet had piled the desk high with potentially helpful tomes. They’d also closed the door to prevent Miss Quackfaster from interrupting and complaining about the noise level. Lena folded her arms across her chest. It wasn’t that she didn’t want their help. She was just afraid of hurting them.

“You’re not going to hurt us. We’re not that fragile. I promise,” Webby said and took Lena’s hands. “Come on. Let us help you.”

“These books contain magical theory and how to harness your powers,” Violet said. “They may vary slightly because shadows don’t engage with magic the same way, but the basic principles should be the same. Why don’t you give this a try?”

Violet pulled out a book and flipped it open to a page in the middle. Lena eyed her shrewdly. She must have read this book before to know where the information was. She’d suspected her of having an eidetic memory and here was the proof. Great. Violet and Webby were both smarter than her. She was back to feeling like she couldn’t measure up.

“Hey,” Webby said and unfolded her arms. She took Lena’s hands in her own. “Give it a shot. What’s the worst that could happen?”

Visions of mayhem and her friends screaming in panic and pain filtered through her mind. Lena forced a smile, attempting to shove the images aside. She’d had enough nightmares of that. It didn’t need to become a reality. But Violet was right. If she didn’t use her powers, then her emotions would control them, not her mastering her magic. That was a dangerous situation.

“I guess,” Lena said and scanned the directions. They looked simple enough. She needed to center herself and focus on what she could control. She sat cross-legged on the floor and the other two girls did likewise. Lena closed her eyes, filtering out any outside noise or distractions. Aunt Magica wasn’t here. She couldn’t hurt her. And it wasn’t like Magica de Spell would just stride into a library, anyway. It was too mundane for the likes of her.

Right. Lena’s heart or what passed for it was racing. No distractions. Why was it the harder you try not to think of a thing, the more you think of it? The more she attempted to clear her mind, the louder she thought. 

“Sssh,” Webby said and reached for Lena’s hand again. “We’re here.”

Violet took her other hand and Lena sank back into her trance. This time, with the two girls holding her hands, it was easier to let go. Her mind silenced and she breathed easier.

“Shall we try one of the prompts?” Violet suggested.

Webby and Violet released her hands and Lena struggled to keep a grip on her chill. It threatened to float away on the next proverbial breeze.

“Can you make a sword horse? Not to scale, I mean. Just, you know, a little hand-sized one?” Webby asked. Lena rolled her eyes behind her closed lids. 

“That’s the first thing you think of? A unicorn?” Lena scoffed.

“I really like sword horses…” Webby protested, sounding slightly wounded. Lena rolled her eyes again and envisioned a unicorn. She was afraid to open her eyes and discover how badly she’d screwed up. 

“There, pink. Don’t say I never give you anything.”

“You did it!” Webby cheered. Lena opened her eyes and the ephemeral unicorn, which had been comprised of pink magic, scattered into thin air. Dispirited, she glanced at her friends. That wasn’t supposed to happen. She was supposed to have more control than that. Aunt Magica would’ve had her hide.

“Uh, Lena?” Violet said and Lena jerked her head in her direction.

“What?” Lena spat.

“The chair beside you is floating,” Violet replied and Lena groaned. She hadn’t even realized she’d grabbed it with her powers. She put it down. Or, rather, she thought to release it. She couldn’t figure out how she was holding it, which meant she didn’t know how to let it go. This wasn’t like the unicorn. Lena didn’t know how to turn it off.

“It’s okay,” Webby said. “Just bring it down gently.”  
  
“I can’t!” Lena huffed. “I could do it when Aunt Magica was part of me, but now that I don’t have her, I can’t focus!”

“But we’re here,” Webby said. “And we’re better than Magica. We’d never condemn or castigate you. Sssh.”

It was like groping around in the dark for a light switch. After what felt like an eternity, she located the part of her mind where the chair floated and dropped it. Unfortunately, she hadn’t lowered it to the floor first and it slammed into the floor behind her. Lena smiled weakly, chagrined. It’d made a rather large boom when it had crashed. Maybe no one had noticed?

They looked around and Miss Quackfaster, who was at the reference desk in the distance, glanced at them, sniffed disapprovingly, and went back to looking something up. They heaved a sigh of relief.

“I didn’t mean to grab the chair,” Lena said, defensive. “It just kinda happened.”

“Perhaps because you subconsciously associate magic with Magica de Spell, you have conflicting feelings about utilizing it?” Violet suggested.

“Maybe,” Lena said, still feeling defensive and sullen.

“Practice should help with that,” Violet said. “Again.”

“Are you crazy? I could hurt you. I could have hurt you just now if that chair had come down on your heads.”

“But you didn’t,” Webby argued. “And Violet’s right. You’re only going to get better with practice. So try again.”

“You’re both insane,” Lena grumbled. “But fine. I’ll give it another shot.”

If she didn’t end up killing them, it’d be a minor miracle.

* * *

  
  
By the time the moon invasion rolled around, Lena thought she was getting pretty good at handling her powers. She’d been training with Violet every single day for a week and hadn’t managed to kill or maim her yet, though that remained in the back of her mind. She didn’t want to have to worry about hurting her friends when she used magic, which meant she needed to get better faster. But she couldn’t push herself too much or she’d lose control.

Magic was a balancing act and Lena felt like she’d been shoved onto a tightrope without instructions. She was across one hurdle and heading for the next one. But, you know, life felt pretty good. She hadn’t seen Magica in weeks, she was getting a handle on her magic, and she had a home to return to and people to talk to. So what if they were nerds? Violet was _her _nerd. 

She didn’t know what would happen in the future, but...she was pretty confident she wouldn’t blow anyone up or attack them. At least, no one who didn’t deserve it. As for the rest of the future, she’d wait to see what happened. It was the first time in her entire life that she could choose her fate and she intended to make the most of it.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Purple Shadows (cancelled)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23581003) by [RedNRainy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedNRainy/pseuds/RedNRainy)


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